Bokeh
by Smritz
Summary: It's a strange world Light Yagami lives in. Relegated to the position of the fiance of a prominent leader in the community and nothing more, Light has minimal power and maximum luxury, and he's learnt to live with that. Everything is fine, until a man with wild black hair bursts into his home and tells him his whole life is a lie. LxLight
1. The Party

Chapter 1: The Party

"Over here, Yagami-san! I picked up the drinks!"

"Yagami-san! We need approval on the curtains!"

"When are you getting dressed, Raito? The guests will be here any minute!"

To say that Light Yagami was sick of his life was an understatement. He was sure plenty of people would gladly lynch him for daring to make that kind of a statement (which was why he had resigned it to the depths of his mind) but goddamn was he sick of this. People were dying, in this world. Hoards and hoards of people were being executed, living in poverty, being ravaged by criminals and savages…and here he was, getting ready for a party.

He wished he could actually help the suffering poor (and they really did need the help), but he couldn't, could he? And that was the rub of it: he was so close to it, so close to the power, but he could never truly have it because of who he was. A trophy, that was all he was.

Maybe fifty years ago he could have been an actual person of influence, but ever since the worker revolutions, the entire social structure had toppled, and the part of the nobility Light belonged to had been given the short end of the stick in their effort to keep their riches and influence.

The Nobleman's Treaty that had finally stopped the revolution contained several clauses, some of which included: 1. the elimination of the anarchist groups, 2. the redistribution of wealth from the lower lords to the peasants, and 3. the adulteration of the bloodlines of higher nobles by forcing one member of the family to mate with members of the lower classes.

For some reason, the treaty had been very detailed on how the impurification of the noble bloodlines would be done. They had sectioned off half of the nobility into two sects, some of whom would marry peasant women and others who would marry men. If two members of the same sex were married together, they either adopted from the constant stream of war-orphans or got surrogate mothers.

Light had gone to school with the other half of the nobles, the ones left intact (according to the history textbooks, the nobles had done everything but beg on their knees to spare half of the noble houses. How else would they continue their bloodlines?).

His parents hadn't even told him their family was one of the sectioned until his sixteenth year, when they had cornered him in the living room with a book of lower-class suitors begging for his hand. Sayu was their Bloodline child, she would be married into a noble family to keep their line going. Light was their unwilling sacrifice for the greater good. And the worst part was, he had never for a minute of his life considered that this could be an option. He would never be able to sit at councils, craft up laws, debate with his equals. All of that was reserved for his future husband, all he could ever be was _rich_. A wealthy, attractive, well-mannered prize.

 _Fuck_ that. He was smart, it was most of who he was. Smart, ambitious, meticulous. Were they telling him that was all a waste?

Light had always assumed he would end up running away. It was just the kind of thing he would do. If he was denied freedom, he would go seek it. And if his arranged fiancé had been a dominating freak as most of them were (inferiority complexes acting up), it would only have strengthened his resolve.

Luckily, though, he hadn't had to.

Dr. Mikami Teru. Charming, disciplined and one of Shingata's best criminal neurosurgeons. Light hadn't had high hopes about his future fiancé in the beginning, especially with that borderline insane light in his eyes, but from the first minute he heard him speak Light had realised how damn lucky he was. Mikami was respectful, kind, knowledgeable (if not particularly insightful), and he made such an effort to get the brunet to like him that it was almost endearing. He was attractive enough to match the family, and best of all, he could tell the dark-haired man knew how much more intelligent than him Light was. That in itself was a blessing, it meant Mikami actually listened to what he had to say.

So the man was a little controlling. Everyone had their flaws. Like Light's neuroticism and arrogance, it was a little annoying, but it most certainly didn't spell the death of a relationship.

 _"Raito!"_ Light looked up to see his dark-haired fiancé at the top of the stairs, standing in a pressed black suit with a bright red bowtie at his collar, the glasses on his nose glinting white. "You can't stand around in your pyjamas as the guests come! Come up and change!"

The boy glanced down at his clothes. Formal trousers and a button-up shirt, they could hardly count as pyjamas, but it was really no use arguing with Mikami about things like this. The good doctor would just bring up his notion that Light was a rebellious teenager and then everything would become unpleasant.

He huffed, trudging up the stairs. He passed Mikami's tall, strict figure without a word of acknowledgement, but felt a hand grab hold of his wrist tightly. "Where do you think you're going?"

The teenager glimpsed at his fiancé over his shoulder, feeling a knot of irritation in his stomach. "I'm…going to change. Like you told me to."

For a second, he thought he saw Mikami's expression change from its default intensity to something stranger. A fearful frown appeared on the older man's face, making his smile seem eerie.

"Not inviting me?"

Light raised his eyebrows, taken aback. "I thought the guests were coming? Aren't you busy?"

For some reason, relief splashed over the doctor's face like a bucket of cold water. "I'm never too busy for you, beautiful." His hands traced down Light's torso, stopping at his waist, where he gripped him tightly and pulled him flush to himself. Light gulped as the man held him tight, breathing down his neck. "All you need to do is ask, and I'll do anything for you."

Light laughed against the older man's chest. "Okay, Mikami, I get your point, but we don't have time for anything right now."

"Believe me, Raito, if you ask, I'll-"

"Do anything for me, I get it." Light chuckled, placing his hands firmly on Mikami's chest and pushing off of him. "Maybe after the party, okay?"

"If you say so." The doctor grinned toothily. "I guess I have to keep my head today anyway. Important deals to be made, I can't afford to go in after a shot of Yagami Raito."

"You got that right." Light made a gun with his fingers and pulled the trigger, giving him a teasing grin as he sauntered into the dressing room. He enjoyed the laugh that echoed in the hallway behind him as he shut the door. Mikami didn't smile enough, and this was _Light_ saying that.

Mikami's father had said, back during the courting stage before the engagement, that his seriousness was probably due to his mother's death, but Light suspected it went deeper than that. The doctor always acted like he hated people from the bottom of his heart, and that extended to _everyone_. His own father, _Light's_ father, sometimes Light's _mother_ , his colleagues at court and on the estate, his childhood friends…

The only exception to this was Light himself. He was the only one he had seen Mikami make actual sacrifices for, the only one he appeared to _want_ to care for, and Light-Paranoid-Yagami would have labelled this as an act or a scheme if it wasn't for the longing he saw in Mikami's eyes when he thought he wasn't looking.

It didn't come as a surprise, the brunet had always been good at charming people to his side, but that didn't mean it didn't flatter him.

* * *

His back hurt from bowing so much, but Yagami Raito, the perfect mate, would never let that show. After all, it wasn't many mates who were allowed to participate in serious discussions as Mikami was letting him right now, it wasn't common to allow them to attend these political gatherings at all. You'd think with all the effort noble parents put into giving their child an education, the treaty would let them have a slight edge over their lower-class mates in this sphere, at least.

Hmm. Now that he thought about it, this was probably the reason his father had never allowed him to take up any extra courses, no matter how brilliant he was. He was always encouraged to pursue extracurricular activities like tennis, not so much the intricacies of history or law.

And now that he thought about it, his father was a class A bastard. Who the fuck hid something like this from their children for so many years? (And how had Light not figured it out himself? His mother was an educated, brilliant woman of her own right, resigned to a position as a housewife very much against her will. It should have been _obvious)._

Light bowed deeply to another diplomat from England, Mr. James, ripe for making a deal to send peacekeeping forces to assist with Shingata's recovery from civil war. It was of utmost importance that these political leaders got a good impression of Mikami and the nobles as a whole. Mikami had become quite the leader within the community, having gotten engaged to the prominent Yagami family and making his name within his profession. It was no wonder the government was having them host the party, they were pretty much the poster children for the Nobleman's Treaty working out.

Mikami grabbed Light's arm suddenly, startling him out of his thoughts. The brunet bit his lip, realising he had zoned out completely. His fiancé only ever resorted to manhandling him when his inferiority complex was acting up, as if having Light by his side automatically validated him.

"Which is why, I think, it would be a bad idea to put up so many of our soldiers in Shingata. It compromises us. You understand my point, don't you, Mikami-sensei?"

The doctor flushed red, his glasses flashing as he struggled to think of a polite way to respond to that. "Well, _I_ think-"

No, bad idea. Mikami had never been one to mince words when trying to prove himself right. Light turned up the wattage of his smile, stepping slightly forward. The diplomat was much larger than him, with cropped blond hair and bulging muscles. His masculinity only worked to Light's advantage, Light was a naturally androgynous person, making him a much less threatening and so less offensive figure.

"With all due respect, Mr. James, this deal actually works out much to your advantage, especially if you choose to haggle some of the details." Light smiled charmingly. Intrigued, James raised an eyebrow.

"Really? Pray tell me, how would England directly benefit from sending so many soldiers to help murder a bunch of anarchists?"

He pretended to think for a minute. "Well, we don't have many resources at the minute, thanks to the anarchists, of course, but one thing we do have, it's technology. We all know that. Our technology is miles ahead of most other countries. I believe Teru supervised the invention of some revolutionary neurosurgical machinery about a year ago, he would be an expert on this." The brunet manoeuvred the conversation back to Mikami in an effort to get him involved like a good mate should, but the Englishman hardly batted an eye at the black-haired man.

"Interesting. We hadn't considered your capacity to contribute in anything but training and manpower before this, but you are right. The most valuable thing about Shingata at the minute has nothing to do with any of that."

Light nodded politely. "Exactly. Which is why we have a lot to offer you in exchange for your valuable assistance."

Mr. James's eyebrows furrowed as his ice-blue eyes swept up and down Light's slender form. "You have good points, Yagami Raito. A new perspective." A smile curled his thin lips. "I shall consider the deal once more, in that case, if only to haggle the details, as you so aptly put it."

"I'm glad." Light bowed his head and stepped back slightly behind Mikami, making the diplomat laugh.

"How very formal you are! We're allies here, no need to be so polite with us. Come here." The man reached out and took Light's hand in his, squeezing it tightly. "This is how we celebrate a partnership. A handshake. Not that you should be celebrating yet, but what the hell. With interesting people like you representing it, Shingata and England will be united in no time."

Light bit his lip, giving him a sheepish smile. "I'm flattered, sir, but I'm not a representative of anything. My fiancé, Dr. Mikami, though-"

"Bollocks." The Englishman laughed. "You're ten times more competent than your fiancé is. The amount of time he took to get to the point… No offense, young man, but your country should really rethink their policies."

Light glanced up at Mikami, a chill running down his spine. If the diplomat kept talking like this, the brunet would probably never be allowed to a formal gathering ever again. He would be a cooped-up trophy like every other nobleman under the treaty. "I…well…"

Mikami's arm snaked around him, pulling him close enough for him to feel every breath of the older man's strained laugh. "We all know how charming Raito can be. Would you like to, um, try out some appetisers?"

Predictably, after _that_ meeting, Light was conveniently left out of every other discussion his fiancé participated in (there had come a point when he had literally gone into one of Mikami's circles to ask him something, and the doctor had blocked him out with a shoulder).

Well, no thank you. Light wasn't desperate, he wasn't going to compromise on his pride for some shitty diplomat's meeting, even though his interference would benefit the whole country. Mr. James had been right, Light _was_ more competent than Mikami. Why couldn't his fiancé think of the greater good more often?

The teenager sighed, grabbing a chair by the punch table and slumping onto it, watching the several black-suited men and women gathering around in scattered groups around the large polished ballroom, chatting busily about things that mattered. And now fucking Mogi would come over to ask if the curtains matched the fucking flowers in the vases.

How did he get caught up in these situations? He had been a good student, he always obeyed his parents and his teachers had voted him most likely to succeed in the future (they hadn't known about his being sectioned, he used his father's surname). Why was he always so _stuck?_

He felt a finger tap his shoulder urgently, digging sharply into his skin, and the teenager immediately straightened up. Fuck, had he been slouching? He wasn't supposed to be _slouching_ right now, he was at an important gathering. Fuck it, maybe _this_ was why he was stuck. Discipline, he needed some fucking discipline.

With a forced smile, Light got to his feet, spinning around to face the man beckoning him. "Can I help-"

"Raito-kun."

The whisper was a monotone, deep and somehow tender, and it sparked something inside Light, like a word that was right on the tip of his tongue.

.

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A/N: What do you think? Is it a promising story? I love writing it XD please review me!


	2. Ryuuzaki Rue

Chapter 2: Ryuuzaki Rue

"Raito-kun."

The last time someone had called him that was in high school. It spoke of half-forgotten memories, friendships, yelling for someone across the corridors, scribbling busily into a notebook, having an actual purpose in life, no matter how boring it was. But it was all Yagami-san nowadays (Yagami-san, approve the damn curtains, taste the damn punch, do everything that nobody fucking notices). And he understood why, it was his last name that mattered.

Light blinked, giving the other man a once over. Pale as a ghost, the man probably stood at a couple inches taller than Light's five-seven, though that didn't matter because of his pronounced hunch. A shock of ginger hair rested over his brow, looking exceptionally like a low-budget wig, though the brunet was far too polite to bring it up. He wore a black suit with a rumpled white shirt underneath, looking so haggard that Light was surprised the guards outside had even let him in. The brunet's gaze dipped, and he bit back a gasp.

No shoes. No goddamn shoes. Where did this idiot think he was?

"I-I'm afraid we haven't been acquainted." Light put on his most dazzling smile and stuck out his hand. If he had been let in despite looking like something on his monthly issue of Poverty Illustrated, he was probably some sort of genius billionaire. "I'm Dr. Mikami Teru's fiancé, Yagami Raito. As you already seem to know."

The man cocked his head, his red wig slipping slightly from his jet black hair underneath. He studied the hand with huge black eyes as if it had just come unscathed from a fire. Wordlessly, the strange guest turned his gaze to him, and Light felt like he was drowning in a midnight sky. "We are being watched, then."

"Sorry?" The brunet frowned, his smile not slipping. The guest sighed, suddenly taking his hand in his and shaking it firmly. The pressure of his hand was cold, unyielding, strong as iron cables.

"Ryuuzaki Rue. Dignitary from…France. Or do we already have one of those?"

Light was at a loss. "We don't have any French dignitaries, actually. I'm…glad for your presence. If you'd like, I could introduce you to Teru-"

"Raito-kun!" A high voice whisper-screamed as something barrelled into him, grasping him in a hug that wrinkled his clothing. Light held back a grunt, clutching the table for support. The force was gone almost as quickly as it had appeared, and suddenly Ryuuzaki-san was holding a pile of blond hair and red sequins by the scruff of the neck. The young woman swept the hair out of her face and grinned at him. "Misa is so glad you're okay, Raito-kun! Misa was so worried about you! We all were, L especially-"

"Shut up, Misa. We are being watched." Ryuuzaki-san said shortly. "I am sorry for bringing her, Raito-kun, but it was necessary and offered me cover, considering my unusual appearance."

 _Just your appearance?_ Light shook his head, trying to gather his thoughts and keep himself as diplomatic as possible. "No, Mr. Ryuuzaki, it's quite alright. You're very welcome here. I, um…would you like to meet the host?"

"Is it necessary to meet the host?" The pale man's eyebrows drew down over his carefully blanked expression. "Does he have a hold on you in some way, Raito-kun? Blackmail or threats?"

 _What?_ "Um, I'm sorry, I must have misunderstood your question." What a fucking eccentric. Of course Light got stuck with the eccentrics, this was just the way his life was. "Are you referring to my fiancé?"

"Oh my god." Misa let out a theatrical gasp, her hazel eyes widening impossibly. "Has he hurt you?" Suddenly, the woman had launched herself at him again, wrapping her arms around his neck and, to his absolute mortification, rubbing her body against him. "Oh, Raito-kun, Misa wishes we'd done this sooner, but we couldn't find you, R-Ryuuzaki says he's keeping you hidden!"

Light squirmed in her grasp, blindsided. "Misa-san…!" He glanced over to the rest of the ballroom and to his absolute horror, he saw several of the dignitaries staring blankly at him. _Oh god_. "Misa-san, if you could please release me-"

"Get your hands off of him." A sharp, low-pitched voice shot out from right behind them, and Light felt his stomach sink. A rough hand grabbed him by the upper arm and yanked him away from the woman.

Mikami was absolutely furious, so angry the blood coloured his face all the way to the neck. "Who are you? How dare you lay a hand on my mate?" He squinted at her, his grip tightening on Light's arm. "Are you even on the guest list?"

Misa shrank back, looking over her shoulder for her partner but predictably, Ryuuzaki was long gone. She stuttered, nervously picking at her long blond hair. "N-no but…M-Misa was R-Raito's friend…j-just coming to visit…" The girl looked beseechingly at him, and Light let out a heavy sigh. Some strange intuition was telling him to back her up, but damn it, she was _annoying_.

He turned his head to look at Mikami, which is why he could be a direct witness to the psychotic light flooding his deep brown eyes. "She's telling the truth, she went to school with me." He cut himself off faced with the doctor's most murderous expression. "I'm sorry, Teru-"

His fiancé raised his hand and his fingers loudly. Promptly, one of the maids rushed over. "Yes, Mikami-sensei?"

"Have security escort this girl out." Mikami said with dead eyes, nails digging into the brunet's soft skin. "I think you've had enough for the day, haven't you, Raito? I'll take you to your room."

Light gulped. "Teru, I'm fine-"

"Don't make a scene. You've already embarrassed me in front of everybody." The doctor hissed, and Light looked away, his face burning.

"I'm sorry."

"You'd better be sorry." The older man released Light and wrapped his arm around his shoulders, putting on a sweet, fatherly expression. "Hey, it's okay." He crooned a pitch louder than usual. "I'll take you up to your room, you'll be fine, okay?"

The words churned in his stomach like acid. Of course Mikami was pissed off at him for something that had absolutely not been his fault. He was just mad about the fact that he'd shown him up earlier with Mr. James, that was all there was to it. These fucking mates and their inferiority complexes, and this fucking world that encourages these idiots to be the head of the family in place of noble-borns like Light.

Mikami marched him up the stairs, still holding him uncomfortably tightly, and threw the door to his room open, shoving him inside.

"You know, Raito, I treat you exceptionally well." The door slowly swung shut behind him.

There was no disputing that. "I know."

"I could let out all of the frustration I have bottled up against the nobles on you, you know. All those years before the Yagami family looked upon me to marry their child, so many years of hard work and neglect that the upper-class surgeons never had to face, I could blow off all the steam on you. But I don't, you know why?"

Light didn't like the look in his fiancé's eye. He backed away, his shoes sinking into the soft carpet. Mikami strode a step forward, a cold grimace pulling at his lips. "Do you know why, Raito?"

The brunet shook his head, bumping against the frame of his bed and stopping, his heart pounding too loudly in his chest. "Mikami, I'm sorry. I didn't know she would do that."

His words were bouncing off of the other man, hardly even registered. "Tell me, Raito. I know you know why."

"Teru…" Light's hands, to his absolute disgust, were shaking. "It wasn't my fault, she did it out of nowhere. I was only being courteous, I didn't…I didn't say or do anything for her to react that way."

In response, Mikami grabbed Light by the hair at the nape of his neck and dragged him towards him. The teenager let out a squeak, trying to withdraw, but his fiancé pressed him against the bedpost and jammed his lips against his. Light gasped in a breath, immediately regretting it when Mikami took that opportunity to deepen the kiss. He waited it out, nails digging into the skin of his palm until the older man finally pulled away, glaring viciously at him. "All I ask of you is to not cause any more trouble. Can you do that?"

Light nodded, bile rising to his mouth.

"Good." Mikami pushed off of him and slammed the door shut on the way out, and Light could hear the distinct sound of a lock clicking.

He would not cry. He would not cry for something as stupid as this. No matter what everybody told him, he wasn't useless. He wasn't only good for picking out tablecloths. He had a bigger future in front of him. He…he would be able to be independent, one day, he would have the means to rise to the top on his own.

 _It hadn't even been his fault._

Light's eyes stung as the tears ran down his cheeks, but he refused to sob. He wasn't going to cry for these assholes. It wasn't fair, but then nothing was fair, really. He had a good thing going right now. He was going to use this to his advantage, he was going to have Mikami wrapped around his finger one day. One day.

The brunet sat heavily down on his bed, slipping off his shoes and drawing his legs up, lying on the side facing away from the door.

One day, they were going to regret putting him in this position. One day, they were all going to beg for forgiveness for treating him like he was less than trash.

He closed his eyes and pretended to sleep.

.

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A/N: I love hearing from you guys, so please review me! It means a lot!


	3. Apologies

Chapter 3: Apologies

 _Bang._

Light shot awake, breathing heavily as he looked for the source of the sound. He rubbed his eyes as he glanced around the room. It was unexpectedly dark, though he was pretty sure he hadn't switched off the lights when he'd fallen asleep.

He looked down at his feet and noted the blanket covering him. Looks like Mikami had come in to apologise at some point and had decided to barge into his personal space instead. His suit jacket was gone too, leaving him in just his long-sleeved silk shirt and trousers, making the blanket a necessity. It was freezing.

The brunet was just about to snuggle back into his warm bed when he noticed the floor glittering. He leaned over, frowning, then widened his eyes in alarm.

There was a sizeable rock inside his room. Smooth as the decorative pebbles they had in their backyard, but this one was black as tar and gleaming with polish. He scrambled out of bed and picked it up, turning it over in his hand and brushing his thumb over the jagged carving on one side, the Katakana word for England. Why would anyone scratch a letter onto a rock and hurl it through someone's window?

 _Holy fuck, someone had hurled it through his window_. Light raked his hands through his messy auburn hair, surveying the damage. Carefully, taking pains not to step in the scattered fragments of glass that littered the ground, Light tiptoed to the window and peered out of it.

There was a person in their backyard, just standing there in the dark. He could see the shadow clearly in the moonlight, the inky black blur in the deep grey surroundings. And slowly, as if waiting for him to absorb every detail of his movement, the silhouette raised its stick-like arm in greeting.

Light padded down the stairs as quickly as he could without waking everybody in the house. He tiptoed through the kitchen, grabbing an iron poker from the fireplace on the way, and approached the sliding door. He pushed it open anyway to venture out onto the cold wooden porch, realising he'd left his shoes in the room.

"Who's there?" He whisper-called, squinting into the pitch-blackness to where he had seen the figure. He stepped forward, just on the edge of the steps leading out into the yard. "Mogi?"

And there he saw it again, that flicker of a shadow all the way behind one of their dead cherry blossom trees. Without thinking twice, Light wielded his poker, marching out onto the crisp air and squelching mud with bare feet. "Hey, listen up, the party's over. You're not going to get to do your fucking assassination plot, nobody important is left in here to-"

Suddenly, strong hands grasped him and yanked him forward, a hand jammed over his mouth. Light dropped his poker in shock, then realised what a fucking stupid thing that was to do. His assaulter pushed him up against the dead tree, and by the light of the moon, Light could catch a blindingly white grin in a pale face that had the capacity to haunt his nightmares for weeks.

"Hello again, Raito-kun."

 _Ryuuzaki Rue._

* * *

"I can't believe you're making me do this. Why don't you ever take Mello?" BB grumbled as they waited in the shadows of the large tree in Mikami's backyard for Yagami Raito to come downstairs after receiving their message.

L shushed him, chewing busily on his fingernail, his eyes fixed on the broken bedroom window where he had seen the head of auburn hair appear. His Raito-kun.

It had been seven whole months. L could hardly believe it, it felt like centuries. For seven months, he had hardly made any progress with getting them out of the country, he had spent every minute of every day looking for Raito, figuring out where he was. There had been a close call two months ago, when they had zeroed in on the house, but in the depths of the night, as if Mikami had picked up on how close they were, the entire family had moved away to a more secure location.

Somewhere down the line, L had started to give up. He stopped believing that he would ever see Raito again, searching for him had become more of a routine than a passion. He couldn't stop looking, because that would have torn the heart out of his chest, but he couldn't keep looking either, because it was killing him.

He had never been an optimist. Optimists didn't tend to grow up in the bowels of a godforsaken orphanage smack-dab in the middle of war-torn Tawakoshi, they didn't have their successors arrested for multiple murders, they didn't lose their status as an upcoming detective to flee across the country trying to find a way to escape without getting caught and executed for being a so-called anarchist.

For all of his life, that had been fine. Pessimism worked just as well for a detective, and even helped with his cases. He didn't need drive or ambition, because he could do just as well without them as long as Watari and his successors kept him going.

But then, in the middle of nowhere, Light Yagami had walked into his life. Light, who had grown up safe and sheltered in the noblemen's counties. Light, who had had so many plans for the future before they'd been dashed to the ground. Light, who saw the world as a berry bush ripe for plucking…and suddenly, L started catching himself believing in fantasies, that anything was possible if he worked hard enough, that maybe an ideal world really could become a reality as long as everyone cooperated with it.

There was movement at the sliding door that led inside Mikami's large white mansion, and then a lanky teenager stepped out into the shadows, his silhouette illuminated in moonlight. He seemed wary and on guard, and it looked like he held a poker in his hand.

Blood roared in L's head, and a crazily wide smile stretched his lips as his heart thumped painfully in his chest. It was finally over, the period of penance, he would finally have his Raito-kun back and he could forget that horrible mistake he had made, the reason he had lost everything, the worst day of his entire life.

"Who's there?" The boy called, as if he didn't know perfectly well. Light liked to play these games, he always had, and no matter how tiresome they were, L would do anything to play them with him again.

Soon enough, the teenager did approach them, as if giving up on the game, and he got just close enough for L to pounce on him and pin him to the tree. He felt a bubble of excitement expand in his chest but this was not the time for emotions, they were in a hurry, they couldn't afford to be caught.

"Hello again, Raito-kun." He felt the boy's slender figure through his silken nightshirt, he felt the same, warm, healthy and attractive, but younger, more delicate, as if Mikami had softened him up. L swallowed the sentiment and basked in the fact that he was touching his Raito-kun again. _After so very long…_

Light screamed.

L froze, baffled, as the boy struggled in his grasp, breaking out of it with a breathless wheeze and scrambling to get away from him. Beside him, L's murderous successor shot to action, grabbing the teenager by the waist and hauling him back, clapping his hand tightly over his mouth. Light bucked and cried out, raking his nails over the other man's skin.

"Ow! What the fuck, L? Why is he acting like a little bitch?"

The brunet squirmed and mewled as he struggled in BB's hold. L cocked his head, alarmed, black hair falling onto his face. "Raito-kun? It's me, Ryuuzaki."

Light didn't seem to even register his words. "Get the fuck off of me!" The teenager yelled into BB's hand. "Please! Please let me go!"

BB snorted. "No need to get so pissy about it, twerp. We're not here to hurt you." He said in his rumbling baritone. Light flinched, keeping his focus on trying to pry BB's hand from his face. A spark of murderous rage glinted in the depths of BB's crimson eyes…L decided to intervene before the serial killer did something drastic, like snap his lover's neck.

"Raito-kun." L stepped forward, his pale fingers brushing the teenager's silken sleeves. "I completely understand that you're angry with me. Misa is so very sorry, as usual, but I do not expect your forgiveness. Did he…did he punish you?"

The boy finally met his eyes, and L felt a chill go down his spine. The brown eyes were blank, glossy with panic, watching him as he would a complete stranger. There was no spark of recognition in those eyes, he was a blank slate.

What had Mikami _done_ to him?

Luckily, L's intervention had had the effect of making Light go limp, which allowed his successor to retain his sanity for a little longer.

"What's the matter with you, Yagami?" BB shook him roughly. "Does your bastard fiancé know anything? Did he narrow down to us or something? Is it Misa's fault? Because if it is, that idiot's going to get it." With a dramatic flourish, he released Light's mouth to draw his carving knife from his belt.

The brunet's face turned sickly pale, his mouth shuddering as he tried to form words. "I-I…d-don't…" He gulped, squeezing his eyes shut and forcibly evening out his breaths. He raised his palms in surrender, addressing L with his most placating mask, a mask the detective remembered from their very first meeting, as if they had been thrown back in time, all the developments between them gone.

"Listen, I-I'm just a mate, okay? I don't have any important information to give you. I wish I did, I really do. M-Mikami isn't all that high up either, he was only picked for the party because my father pulled some strings. He was more a venue than an actual host. We're not as prominent as you think. P-please reconsider this." And accompanied with that shaky smile, just enough to cover up the absolute fear in his eyes.

"Wow, nobles are so fancy." BB snarked. "Usually, people just beg for mercy."

L nibbled at his fingernail. "Raito…it's me. You're acting like you don't recognise me."

Light took in a calming breath. "I do recognise you, Ryuuzaki-san. Please, if you just tell me what you want, I'm sure we can make a deal-"

"Okay, that's it." BB snapped. "We've wasted enough time. You can explain your deal in the car." He stalked forward and, to the brunet's horror, pulled out a roll of duct tape. "Hold him down, L."

L was about to follow his orders for once when a clatter came from the sliding door at the porch.

"Raito?" A familiar voice called. BB surged forward, elbowing L into the shadow of the tree and dragging their captive behind it himself. Light struggled to get his mouth free of BB's huge hand, but the murderer drew his carving knife again, sticking the blade under the teenager's chin.

The former detective peeked out from behind the tree to see the tall man at the landing in baby-blue pyjamas with a gelled mop of straight black hair and glasses crooked on his nose. He felt a pit of hot anger open up in his stomach, mixed with a bitter taste in his mouth.

L had a gun in his belt, and this man was so clearly defined in the yellow light of the kitchen.

"Raito? Hey, I know you're there. I-I know you come here when you're upset." Mikami's voice was warbling, tentative. "Could you come out, please? I'd like to talk."

L hadn't planned to kill him at this time, but it was so convenient…and Matt had arranged it so the security wasn't going to cross paths with them if they hurried…

When he didn't receive any reply, the doctor seemed to accept defeat. "Yeah, I guess not. I came by earlier, but you were asleep. Raito…" There was a pause. "I couldn't sleep knowing I'd hurt you. Please don't be upset. I'll…I'll do anything to make it better, Raito. I'll…next time, I'll make sure to let you join in, alright? You do have better ideas than me, you're better with words, I should just accept that. I'd…I'd never mistreat you, you know that, right?"

Light was the first to notice L drawing his gun, his eyes bugging out of his skull in fright. It was enough to make L pause (he wasn't a murderer, but Mikami had to die, didn't he? Not only for the crimes he had committed, but also the obstacle he would prove to become…). Luckily, as always, his former successor was there to reassure him.

"Do it, L. He's a nasty one anyway. It isn't hard, just pull the trigger."

Light shook his head frantically, his pleading muffled and desperate.

"It will be beneficial for everyone if I shoot him, Raito-kun. Please try to understand." L said in his even monotone, raising the muzzle of his gun up and aiming it. They would have to move quickly after the gunshot, before the security came this way.

BB grinned. "Go on, L. Aim and fire."

Mikami let out a forlorn sigh, back at the porch. "I guess we'll talk in the morning, then, beautiful. Sleep well." There was a shuffling and a rough scrape as he slid the sliding door open again.

L took a couple of quick breaths out of mouth to balance himself. _In, out, in out_. It wasn't a big deal, it was about as easy as killing a rabbit. Swiftly, the former detective steadied his hands, his gun held tight, and prepared to squeeze the trigger.

Light suddenly wrenched BB's hand down and screamed, seconds before the gun fired. _"Mikami!"_

The doctor spun around and was thrown back, his mouth round as his shoulder bloomed scarlet. BB hissed in frustration. "What the fuck was that? _What the fuck was that?"_ He grabbed Light by the collar as he yanked at the duct tape, ripping out a long strip and pressing it securely over the brunet's mouth. "You're not fucking allowed to miss, L! Shoot him again!"

"W-what…? Raito! _Raito!"_ The doctor staggered to his feet, clutching his shoulder desperately. L took aim once more and fired, catching him on the other shoulder and sending him falling to his knees. Light let out a choked sob as BB taped his wrists together and threw him forward.

"Come on, B, we don't have time." L leapt to his feet and sprinted towards the exit Matt had marked down as the one he had secured, leaving his successor to lug his unwilling lover along with them.

.

A/N: And the action has begun! Review and comment please :D


	4. Red

Chapter 4: Red

"What is this bullshit, L? You're _L!_ You don't make shitty plans!"

"It _wasn't_ a shitty plan. I'd worked it out for everything. We worked on it for days, you saw us."

"Well, what the fuck was this, then? I did not sign up for kidnapping a noble kid, alright? I may be crazy but I'm not stupid. Let's fucking slit his throat and get you a prostitute for God's sake!"

"Hey, now. Calm down, BB." A ginger-haired man in a striped shirt stepped in between the two twins, pushing them away from each other. Light could do a good job telling them apart, even though they looked pretty much identical and wore the same clothes. One of them, the one referred to as BB, was a little bit bigger than Ryuuzaki, and his muscles were more well-defined. His eyes were scarlet instead of pitch black, his wild hair looked dyed black instead of natural, and he had a creepy leer that made him look more than a little unhinged.

BB spat at his twin. "You fucking suck, L. You told me you were rescuing a member of the team, not preparing to jack off into a pretty boy. I can't believe I risked going to prison again for _this."_

"B." The redhead waved a hand in front of the larger man's face. "Don't be an asshole. He _is_ rescuing a member of the team. Light's as much one of us as Near is."

The murderous successor scoffed. "Bullshit. L had a clear shot at _Teru Mikami!_ The kid's not on our side by a long shot. I say we shoot him in the fucking head! At least then we don't have another fucking mouth to feed!"

Light dipped his gaze, studying the tanned lines of his own long fingers, placed right in front of his face as he lay on his side like cargo with his wrists wrapped in silver duct tape. His cheek was pressed against the cold metal floor of the van, he felt the beginnings of a bruise over his ribs from when BB had tossed him inside and he was trying very, very hard not to cry.

Nothing like this had never happened to him before. He lived in a country recovering from war, but the battles had always stayed outside his neighbourhood. To him it was a theoretical concept: helping the poor, eradicating the criminals…

To think he had always been in the support of anarchists. In Light's view, the social order in Shingata really was shitty. The anarchists had a point when they said the government should be changed from that of an unhappy union between the nobles and the sectioned to a proper democratic state. He hadn't said any of this out loud, because it would have ruined his family's name, but he had always thought it was unfair hunting anarchists down and exterminating them simply for having a different point of view.

The irony of it all. Mikami had been right, the anarchists really were murderous criminals, and Light was about to find out the hard way.

 _Mikami._

He was trying not to think about Mikami.

He had to be okay. He had to. The anarchist had missed the vital regions, he was sure of that, but Mikami could still be bleeding out, he could be crippled, the security could reach him too late…

Light wouldn't be able to bear it if he died because of him.

The teenager took in a shaky breath through the nose, blinking away tears. He was not going to cry. These men were ready to kill him, the last thing he needed to do was lose control of himself, he would lose any chance of survival.

He had to come up with a plan, but what plan could he make with his mouth taped up? His silver tongue was his trump card, it was what always saved his skin. What was he without words? He couldn't fight, he couldn't defend himself (he couldn't stop Mikami from getting shot).

The van bounced over a bump, making Light hit his head against the hard floor. He groaned softly, pulling his knees closer to his chest and digging his nails into his palm, drawing blood. Damn it, damn it all, why did they pick him? It wasn't for ransom, because then they wouldn't have tried to kill his wealthy fiancé. It wasn't to violate him because, as BB had so aptly pointed out, there were many less risky ways to get what they needed. A kidnapped noble attracted police like ants to sugar.

And it wasn't to _rescue_ him, as Ryuuzaki was so fond of saying, because not only was he a fucking noble in a mansion, he had also never met an anarchist in his life.

Light had very seriously considered a case of mistaken identity, but they called him by his actual name, knew where he lived and appeared to recognise him. How likely was it that there was another nobleman in Shingata right now with Light's face and Light's name, consorting with anarchists? (It wasn't like Raito was a very popular name anyway). But it was his only theory so far, nothing else fit the facts.

Light sighed, bringing himself back into reality. He needed more data, he needed to listen in-

He flinched. There was a white face shoved way too close for comfort to his own, the nose almost touching his forehead. Seeing that Light was no longer zoning out, the dark-haired man squatted down in front of him and chewed off the edge of his fingernail. "Explain yourself, Raito-kun."

Light stared at the strange man, waiting for him to elaborate, take the tape off his mouth, _something_ , but after a minute of waiting, Ryuuzaki simply began to nibble on the nail of his next finger.

The brunet frowned. Was that supposed to achieve something? He had already told them he didn't have any information, they hadn't kidnapped him to interrogate him about anything, had they?

Finally, Ryuuzaki seemed to accept something and leaned forward, reaching out and burying his slender fingers in Light's auburn hair. He cringed, trying to move away, but Ryuuzaki persisted, his fingers spiders combing through his hair, inspecting every inch of his scalp.

The spindly man's fingers probed the crown of his head before withdrawing suddenly, his huge dark eyes blinking before he proceeded to retrieve a piece of candy wrapped in paper from the pocket of his jeans and stick it in his mouth.

"What is it, L?" The redhead came forward, squatting beside him with his arms crossed over his knees. He cast a worried look at Light that only gave more credence to his mistaken identity theory, because why on earth would his kidnappers look so worried for him?

Ryuuzaki shook his head. "I don't understand."

"What?" The ginger-haired man pushed his orange-tinted goggles off of his eyes into his thick hair to better gape at his weird friend. "What don't _you_ understand?"

The pale man ignored him, clamping his hand on Light's arm and yanking him quickly to a sitting position. The brunet let out a huff of surprise, staring blankly at the black-haired man as he cocked his head again.

"You are a puzzle, aren't you?" Ryuuzaki murmured, working on the nail of his little finger. Suddenly, he ripped the tape off of Light's mouth and flicked it to the side. The teenager tried not to wince and failed, but he did not take his eyes off of Ryuuzaki's. _Nobody_ challenged him, especially when they had him tied up and at their mercy.

The black-haired man chewed his candy. "Speak."

Light clenched his jaw, glaring silently at the other man.

"Explain yourself."

 _Explain himself?_ He'd be damned if he explained himself to these goddamn murderer anarchists, who did they think they were? And what did have to explain anyway? He hadn't asked for them to kidnap him! What did this guy expect him to say?

Unexpectedly, a smile quirked Ryuuzaki's lips. "I suppose Raito-kun would have to sulk under these circumstances, his pride would allow no different."

Annoyance flooded his cheeks scarlet. _"Pride?_ Are you serious? You kidnapped me from my home and shot my fiancé twice. What exactly did you expect?" His voice croaked, as if he hadn't used it in days.

The smile disappeared. "What is your name?"

"I'd think you know my name, considering you keep calling me by it. Are you schizophrenic? Did I seriously get kidnapped by an idiot?" Light realised he was babbling and snapped his mouth shut. The stress was getting to him.

"Say your name." Ryuuzaki insisted.

Light shoved his taped wrists into his lap. "Fuck you."

"Your name, or I will be forced to involve BB. He is feeling murderous today."

Despite all his efforts, a chill of fear went down his spine. "I-I don't give a flying f-fuck if you torture me-"

 _"What is your name?"_

Light rolled his eyes, trying to disguise the chattering of his teeth. "Yagami Raito."

"And what is my name?"

Was this some sort of game? Light let his irritation show on his face. "Ryuuzaki Rue."

The redhead, who had been watching the proceedings with fascination, goggled at him. "Huh?"

"It's the pseudonym I told him to call me when I tried to retrieve him during the party." Ryuuzaki replied. "My real name, please, Raito-kun."

Light licked his dry lips. "I'm sorry, but I'm not aware of when you told me your real name."

The ginger-haired boy leaned forward, his interest piqued. "You don't know who I am, then, Light?"

"Am I supposed to?"

"Wow." The boy fiddled with his thumbs, his green eyes wide. "I'm Matt. Mail Jeevas, but you can call me-"

"Don't tell him, you goddamn idiot." A raspy voice came from behind them, and BB was suddenly on his feet, eyes bloodshot like an inmate in an asylum. Light tried to quell that spike of fear coursing through him. _He isn't going to hurt me, Ryuuzaki's testing something, he wouldn't murder me out of the blue..._ "Break me out of jail to do your dirty work and then go around telling nobles your real name. If I get caught again because of you…"

"Take a nap, B." Ryuuzaki monotoned, and the criminal's face turned beet-red.

"Hey, bastard, you want to fight? You want me to kick your fucking ass?"

Matt got to his feet. "Hey, now, B, Ryuuzaki's going through a lot, leave him alone. Why don't you actually take a nap? We can handle things for now."

BB grumbled, but caved in. "Fine, but this isn't because you asked me to. I've had a long day because of you assholes." He shuffled over to a pile of backpacks and laid down on them.

Matt grinned. "Sure it isn't. Goodnight, B."

The murderer muttered something under his breath, but didn't move from his place. Matt raised his eyebrows, smirking. "You drained him out, L."

"Good, at least he'll stay down awhile." Ryuuzaki responded, turning his attention back to Light, his eyes boring deep into his as if daring him to blink. Light refused to budge, meeting the challenge silently and forcefully. _Fuck this guy. Just fuck him. Fuck him and his entire existence._

Twenty seconds into their full-fledged staring match and a smile curled Ryuuzaki's lips upward. "I see your personality traits remain the same."

"Stalker." Light hissed spitefully. Ryuuzaki laughed.

"Is that the conclusion you came to? I can't argue, it is the one which makes the most sense from your point of view. I would like to ask, though, why would I ever stalk you?"

"Oh, I don't know." The brunet spat sarcastically. "Why do perverts stalk?"

 _"Pervert,_ Raito-kun? Now that's low."

 _Was he enjoying this?_ "It's all well and good for you to taunt me while I'm tied up."

The black-haired man laughed again, and cold fingers brushed the teenager's cheekbone, running down to his chin and chucking it affectionately. "You haven't changed at all, Raito-kun. Always plotting and scheming." He sighed. "I can at least be sure it's only memories you've lost."

Light narrowed his eyes disbelievingly at the older man. "I haven't lost any memories. I haven't been through any trauma recently, or ever. I think you've mistaken me for someone else."

"Have I, Raito-kun? I find that hard to believe. It took me months to track you down."

Light shrugged. "You tracked down the wrong place, then. It only proves my point further, you probably just saw me and mistook me for your friend after months of fruitless searching."

To that, he did not receive a reply. Ryuuzaki simply stared at him with those large black eyes, dark as an abyss and glassy as a mirror, his head cocked to the side and thumb brushing the edge of his lip.

Light sat still, refusing to be intimidated. "Listen, I don't know anything about you. I won't talk. Just drop me off wherever, I can find my way home. You and I both know I'm a lot more trouble than I'm worth."

A few more seconds of silence, and Light almost tapped his foot against the ground impatiently. Ryuuzaki contemplated, fishing another candy from his pocket and eyed the wrapping.

He unwrapped it after a few more seconds and paused.

"Raito-kun has one sister. Sayu Yagami, seventeen, currently in high school. He doesn't like it when I bring her up."

The pause was so long Light almost interjected to yell _stalker_ once more.

"He envies her because she will marry a noble and remain an equal even though he is much smarter than she is. He resents his entire family and his mother most of all for lying to him throughout his life. Upon hearing talks of his impending engagement to a certain Dr. Mikami Teru, a suitor who was already emotionally and physically abusing Raito-kun, he ran away from home. He tried to flee the country through several means, one of which brought him to L, alias Ryuuzaki Rue, a former detective who was trying to escape with his entire family through any means possible."

Light pressed his lips together, raking his nails over his palms. "That's an interesting story."

"It is." Ryuuzaki agreed. "But it seems you need more to convince you."

Light looked away. "You're delusional. I don't know how else to explain to you, I'm not the man you're looking for-"

"Red."

The brunet blinked. "What?"

"Your favourite colour, it's red."

A pause. Light tried not to register what the other man was saying.

"You play the piano. You write overdramatic poetry. You hate watching people dance. You like potato chips and coffee and think role play during sex is amusing. You are passionate about anarchists and free speech. You have strong opinions on the Nobleman's Treaty which you _say_ are completely objective, but are obviously based on your own negative experiences. You are selfish and childish and arrogant. You are selfless and charming and more intelligent than anybody I've ever met." The pale man traced the line of the brunet's bound hands. "And whenever you get nervous, you press your nails into your palms hard enough to distract yourself with the pain."

Light was quiet, keeping his eyes trained on the ground, refusing to think. He couldn't have lost memories, that was insane, people would have noticed. Mikami, Mikami would have noticed.

Ryuuzaki's hand in his was a shock that had him reeling and shifting quickly away. The man clasped Light's fingers in his, gently uncurling them, his thumb smoothing over the raw cuts that had opened up on the base of his palm.

"You shouldn't cultivate that last habit, Raito-kun. There are better ways to focus than by hurting yourself."

A soft touch on the tip of his nose. Light opened his eyes to see Ryuuzaki pulling away, a tiny smile on his lips.

"As you can see, I know my Raito-kun. He's too strong to stay down for long. And he'll come back to me. He promised he would."

.

.

A/N: Aww the fluff 3 I love L so much!


	5. Prize

Chapter 5: Prize

 _Beep. Beep. Beep._

Mikami smiled groggily, the world spinning about around him. The very minute he had opened his eyes, he'd known he was in a hospital room. His mother had been a surgeon, like him, he had spent a good amount of time in hospital waiting rooms as a child, sneaking away to peer into these large white rooms with their clean white spreads and stiff decorative window shades.

"Mikami-sensei? Mikami-sensei, can you hear me?"

His eyes fluttered open again and he managed to zero in on the person sitting at his bedside, the lanky young man with the shock of rust-brown hair clasping his hands under his chin as he propped himself on his elbows, watching his face intently. The smile that curved Mikami's lips was absolutely natural. _Yagami Raito._

"Hello, Raito." Mikami rasped, his voice sore and papery. He let the smile grow as Raito sat up (had he been dozing off?) and peered in closer, as if studying him. _His Raito was worried about him_ , it warmed his heart. "It's nice to see you. T-thought you were angry with me."

 _Silence._ Mikami let it wash over him. Raito wasn't angry. Nobody could be angry inside a hospital, they waited for their loved ones to get better. It was all better in here, they focussed on making people feel better, his mother had always said that. Even when his father was being condescending, his mother was being neglectful, his siblings were bullying him, it would all be okay in the hospital. It would be okay as long as he was here.

He grinned at his fiancé, watching him as he looked from Mikami to the doorway and back. Everything would be okay, Raito would forgive him, he would hold his hand and wish him well and everything would be fine. It would all be okay.

The spell broke when Raito finally opened his mouth.

"Otou-saaaaaan!"

Mikami reeled back. The voice was so distinctly female, screeching and loud, nothing like Raito's carefully cultivated velvet tones. He prepared himself as the stranger let out another bellow. "Otou-saaaaan! Mikami-sensei is awake!"

The doctor blinked rapidly, his head clearing too quickly in his shock. Sayu, that was Yagami Sayu, Raito's sister, sitting there prim and proper in a bright yellow sundress. Her hair was muddy brown, not rusty, and fell in long waves down her shoulders. He didn't blame himself for mixing them up, they looked unexpectedly similar, kind of like how chocolate from a chocolatier could somewhat resemble candy from a dime-store.

"What are _you_ doing here?" Mikami could barely keep the raw condescension out of his voice. Raito was nothing like her, he was ever so much more refined. "Where's my fiancé?"

The brunette frowned deeply. "You don't know? But Otou-san said you'll know!"

Mikami felt a cold hand run down his spine. He tried his level best to shake off his disorientation and get a grip on the situation.

He was lying in a hospital bed. He was unable to sit up or move and there was a ton of gauze over his torso. He was being pumped up with morphine, which explained why he was so irritable. He had never responded well to painkillers. Luckily, though, they only dispensed morphine to noble patients, which meant they recognised who he was. Nobles got the expensive treatments, they were always out of the hospital in a night at most.

Mikami fixed the girl with a stern look. "Why the fuck would I know?"

"Oh I don't know!" Raito's sister flushed red. "Because you're the one he lives with?"

"Obviously, I am in no condition to keep track of anyone, you idiot." The doctor snapped. "Where's your father?"

"I'm right here, Mikami-kun." A deep voice resonated from the other side of the room. Mikami raised his head to see Yagami Soichiro standing in all of his broad shouldered, police uniformed glory, his badges gleaming gold from his chest. His eyes were bloodshot and piercing, nailing the neurosurgeon down accusatorily. What had _Mikami_ done wrong? As far as he knew, he had been injured…

 _Oh God._

It flooded back to him in flashes. Going down for midnight coffee and seeing Raito's bedroom door ajar on the way. No Raito in bed and the sliding door open in the kitchen, venturing out into the night air. Calling out for his fiancé, wanting, needing to apologise. And then the unmistakable sound of gunshots, piercing agony in his shoulders, stumbling to the ground in a pool of blood. Raito's voice, hoarse in terror. _Mikami!_

"My son is gone, Mikami Teru." Soichiro rumbled, crossing his meaty arms as he glared down at him. "I thought you had made sure he wouldn't run away again?"

 _He didn't, you absolute imbecile._ Look at the evidence, the shooting, the doors left hanging open, the bedclothes left rumpled. Raito never left a mess behind, no matter how much of a hurry he was in. Of course he hadn't run away. _Stupid, stupid man._

"Running away would never have occurred to him, not after the undertaking." The doctor replied, his voice cracking midway.

The pale figure behind the tree pointing the gun at him, dragging his fiancé away by the arms as the brunet struggled to break away to come to Mikami's aid.

"I thought so." The chief of police muttered, loping to his bedside to better loom over him. "I gave my son to you on one condition, Mikami Teru. One single condition, that you would keep him safe. In his vulnerable condition after the undertaking, the least you could have done was protect him, for all your incredible professions of love."

It stabbed, but not for the reasons he thought. "I had security stationed everywhere. I spared no expense. I don't know how this could have happened-" His chest gave a twinge of pain from how heavily he was breathing. "I would _never_ have allowed him to be put in a dangerous situation again, Yagami."

"Then _how_ did this happen?" The police officer growled. _"Where is my son?"_

"I will find him." The doctor breathed. His fists balled up under the bedclothes, his head began to spin. He needed to be off the morphine, he needed to use his brain.

The pale face, a mess of crazy black hair flopping over it, a gun that fired bullets that burned through his skin and took away control of his body as they stole his lover from him.

 _"How_ will you find him? _You're a two-bit prosecutor!_ Your only political connections are through me and my son! The son that you couldn't hold for a _measly seven months!"_ Yagami shouted at the top of his lungs. Sayu, he noticed, was cowering in her seat, unsure of whether she was allowed to leave or not. Mikami winced, his head pounding.

The doctor gritted his teeth together. "And _your_ only connections are through your wife. You're no better than I am, Soichiro. We're the same. I will find your son and bring him back, but not because of any obligation to you. I will bring him back because I love him."

Soichiro sneered. "You talk a lot, don't you? All words and no action. But believe me, if I don't see my son soon…"

The police officer straightened the glinting glasses on the bridge of his nose, his mouth tight as he sent a fierce look down at the doctor. Mikami could only marvel at how similar that expression was on Raito's face, the same narrowed eyes, the same rigid jaw.

"If I don't get him back, Mikami Teru, you know exactly what I'm capable of."

…

There was one more hour left to the drive. One more hour of relative peace.

Once they got to the cottage, it would be questions everywhere. Mello would leap out of the front of the van, pull off his earphones and demand to know what BB had been screaming about all ride. Misa, if she had gotten home after security had booted her out of the Mikami mansion, would shriek in dismay, throwing herself onto her precious Raito. Watari would come out with a disapproving expression and start discussing the measures they had to take to make sure Raito didn't escape, now that L had so stupidly brought him to their home. BB would agree emphatically, suggesting possibly methods to dispose of him without leaving evidence.

 _I have netted my prize._

The thought came unprompted as he watched Matt sit beside Raito, trying to engage him in conversation, and L shuddered. It was such an unsavoury way to look at things, but in a way that was exactly what he had done. Raito hadn't wanted to leave his prison, he had wanted to stay with Mikami, he…he _loved_ Mikami now, and L had taken him anyway.

It wasn't supposed to be this way.

L had imagined so many iterations of this day, the day he would finally see his Raito-kun again. He had imagined everything from the trademark tearful reunion to the hissy fit Light would throw because he'd taken so long. He had imagined rescuing him from his abusive family and scampering off into the sunset, he had imagined sweeping his auburn-haired lover off of his feet and taking him up in a kiss that made up for every moment they had spent apart.

There were so many versions of this moment that could have been true, but none of them existed. The only one that was real was the one he was in now, and in this one, Yagami Raito was a stranger with resentful caramel eyes and a smooth sickle-shaped scar under his soft waves of hair, looping from centimetres over his ear to just below the crown of his head.

He didn't know how it had happened. Was it an accident? Had Light been injured sometime in those seven months? Or did Mikami do this on purpose?

Even though he didn't know how or why, his instinct told him it was the third option. He really hoped it wasn't jealousy powering his instinct, he needed to trust himself. Light's sudden shift of affection from L to Mikami should not affect his judgement, he was a detective, one of the greatest detectives in the world.

If this had actually been deliberate, though…L felt his stomach churn. To think that the man Light had been living with for the past seven months was capable of this…

L observed as Matt went into another high-strung giggling spree, laughing at one of his own jokes. None of the Whammy's boys were particularly good at social situations, but Matt was acceptable enough. His level was more towards reclusive nerd than isolated hermit, which was probably why he and Light had been such close friends.

As testament to that, somehow, Matt's nervous tirade was working. Light looked much more comfortable than he had been half an hour ago, not that that meant anything. The teenager was still scared out of his mind under than infallible mask he had forced himself into.

He was shivering, L noticed. The brunet was wearing only a thin white silk shirt over his trousers. He had curled up into himself and there were goosebumps all over his arms. He was visibly shaking as he gave the oblivious Matt a polite smile. L bit into the strawberry lollipop he had been working on for some time now, his throat closing up. The least he could do after torturing and frightening this innocent teenager…

The former detective pushed himself off the floor, grabbing the handles swinging from the top of the van for support. Mello's driving was the best they were going to get from current company, since Watari was busy, but it was still pretty terrible. He managed to make it to BB, who was dozing off on their pile of supplies.

He rolled him off of them with his foot, not pausing as the murderer stirred and gave him a dirty look.

"What's your _problem?"_ The serial killer groaned, rubbing his eyes and shoving the detective's ankles as he turned over to go back to sleep on the floor.

L caught his balance, digging through the backpacks until he found one of Misa's black matte jackets, complete with a thick fur trim from her modelling days. Balling it up in his hand, he began his journey bumbling along towards his lover and third-ranked successor.

Light had been watching him from the minute he got up, he knew, but the brunet only looked up at him when L draped the jacket over his shoulders.

"You looked cold." L mumbled, squatting down beside the teenager and biting down on his lollipop. Matt smothered a laugh, pulling down his goggles to disguise his expression.

To his surprise, when he finally mustered up the courage to glimpse back at his lover, Light was not glaring venomously at him. His face was entirely blank, disguising what he felt even from him, which was a big deal because L could usually read everything Light felt no matter how he acted.

"Thank you." The brunet breathed, looking down at his folded knees. There was a beat before he glanced at him again. "Um, could you…?" The teenager gestured with his bound hands and L sprang to action.

"Of course. I apologise." The detective wrapped the jacket tighter around the boy, leaning in close to his warm body and trying not to inhale his pleasant, barely-there cologne.

Light noticed his efforts, giving him a semi-amused look as his posture relaxed into the warmth.

L cleared his throat. "I didn't mean to interrupt you or anything."

Matt crossed his legs under him. "Oh, yeah. I was just telling him about the day you first met."

The detective felt his lips twitch into a smile. "That was an eventful day."

"Oh, yes it was." The redhead rolled his eyes dramatically. "So as I was saying…when you finally admitted you were Kira, L basically had a heart attack."

"I did not!" L protested, and Matt laughed.

"Yes, he did. He was shocked out of his mind. He had assumed that the new detective emerging in the anarchist part of Tawakoshi was _BB_ , you see, so when you revealed yourself and demanded a gun and safe passage out of the country, L freaked and Mello drew his gun, threatening to blow your brains out."

Light laughed under his breath. "This sounds straight out of a gangster movie."

Matt grinned. "It sure was, or so I've heard. I wasn't actually there. Anyway, you were totally against the idea of shooting, preferring to try to talk your way out of it through nice hard logical reasoning and, of course, flirting with L. It was all going great, and you had almost talked Mello down when you accidentally let slip that you knew L was the Detective L, and that he was planning to flee the country with us, his successors."

"That didn't sit very well with me." L remarked off-handedly, enjoying seeing Light enraptured by Matt's epic tale.

The redhead rubbed his hands together. "The atmosphere was tense. You were trying to make some sort of a deal to get out of the country, but L and Mello weren't having it. They demanded that you admit how you had found out about their identities and when you refused, they were settling on torturing it out of you. And they probably would have, too…"

"If Amane Misa hadn't made her appearance." L contributed, trying to keep a straight face. Light, _his_ Light had loved telling this story because of this part. Amane was so manic it had amused him, he would always tell the story with her parts exaggerated with hand gestures and dramatic voices.

"So Misa had been living with us for a while now, ever since Mello had rescued her from a crazy stalker (long story that one) and she was pretty much the only person apart from me who could sway him to do anything. She entered the room and took one good look at your face before diving in front of Mello's gun, blocking your body with her own and screaming that we weren't allowed to kill the rescuers of motherless children on her watch (especially if they're as attractive as you are)."

L allowed his smile to break through. Light would have said that line in a falsetto, with a flirty little smile and a coy flick of the head. "And that's how we found out that you were not only Kira, but also the person sending Watari the daily stream of war orphans he delivered to Roger Ruvie's orphanage for our daily income."

Matt snorted. "Mello tried reasoning with her, saying that no matter how nice you are, you're still a security hazard. Misa didn't budge, she likely would never have, and Mello's not known for his patience. Luckily, minutes before he exploded and blew all our brains out, you pulled out your trump card."

"You told us you knew where BB was being imprisoned."

The detective watched Light with owl eyes, waiting for his reaction. The brunet seemed to be waiting for the story to continue, but there was nothing more to say.

If they had been telling the story to someone else, or if Light had been telling the story himself, he would have gone on to narrate the proposition of the infamous handcuffs, how they had eventually led to Light helping L solve cases that they submitted in anonymously for rewards, how that professional relationship had melted so easily into the closest bond L had ever created with another human being as organically as a child growing up. But really, L didn't see a point in telling this Light about all that, not yet.

After a few seconds, the brunet shifted uncomfortably in his place. "So how much of that was true?"

"All of it." L stated. "Perhaps a little dramatic coming from Matt, but the contents were all true."

"Well, it's entertaining, to say the least." Light smirked half-heartedly.

L cocked his head, chewing on his mostly-dissolved lollipop as he waited for the teenager to react further. Unfortunately, Light gave him a guarded look, drawing his knees closer to himself.

"I don't remember any of this, L-san. I don't remember you or Matt or BB or anybody. Not a single trace." The brunet shook his head. "Besides, I have never been outside the nobleman's county. I don't see how I would be able to do so much detective work and find out all these things if I have zero practical knowledge of the world." He gazed at him for a minute, then flashed a roguish smile that had L's heart jump to his throat. "Do you want to hear my theory?"

L finished off the lollipop and threw the stick aside, crunching the last bite. "You're not going to convince me, Raito-kun."

"Just…hear me out. Please."

The detective shrugged. "Alright. Fine."

"You've got to be open-minded about this, okay?" Light ensnared him with those bright honey-brown eyes and took a deep breath. "I think I have an identical twin who was adopted by another family at birth, who found out about my existence and is trying to ruin my perfect life."

There was a beat before Matt let out a baffled guffaw. "Holy shit, I'm sorry I told you those stories, I didn't mean to put your imagination into hyper-drive."

L nibbled on his fingernail, frowning, and Light hurried to backtrack. "It's not as impossible as it sounds. My mother is one of twins, and as was my great-grandmother. My father wasn't a fan of that, he's a little superstitious about all this so it wouldn't be out of character for him to abandon one of his children to a foster home." He shrugged. "So if I was born into a lower-class family and realised that how privileged my twin is, I'd probably want to ruin his life too. It makes sense, his knowledge of all these little details I would never know in my sheltered lifestyle, like how to track you down, what the criminal landscape looks like, when to use an alias…and it completely explains why I have no memory of you. He went and disappeared, leaving me to face the fire for whatever crimes he's committed."

L sighed deeply. "Raito-kun…"

"No, no, please. Give it a chance." Light pleaded, and L felt his heart start to break. Why was he so desperate? It wasn't fair, L had waited _seven months_ to get him back. "Listen, I'll help you find him-"

"Raito-kun."

"I'm serious, I'll help you catch Kira, and if I'm right, if I'm able to find him within w-whatever time limit you want, y-you can let me go-"

 _"Raito!"_

Light's jaw clacked shut, his amber eyes fixed on L's. _It wasn't supposed to be this way_.

The detective felt his anger bubble just underneath the surface. "Yagami Raito. Do you actually expect me to believe that the genius son of the Chief of Police of Shingata doesn't know when to use an alias? _You_ have no practical skills, Raito? You have no knowledge of the world? Don't pretend you're some sort of princess in a tower, you're smart enough to make it in the streets and you know it."

The brunet took a deep breath. "L-san, I'm really sorry, but with all due respect, any knowledge you think you have of me is probably inaccurate considering-"

"Shut up. _Shut up!_ Stop with the _lies!"_ L hissed. "We both know what's true, stop pretending otherwise. I don't understand why you're hiding anything. The only thing I know about your condition is that you've lost your memory, and even that's only because of how you acted when we initially came to rescue you. Every moment you're being so damn difficult, I can't figure out what the fuck is wrong with you because you keep lying to me and hiding things from me. Tell me, Raito, from the moment you were born, have you ever once just told the truth?"

Light swallowed, not daring to take his eyes off of the older man. "I haven't lied to you…"

"Bullshit." The rage snaked up his throat and burned his face. _"Bullshit_. I know you're lying to me, acting like you have no clue how you could have lost your memories. With your rubbish theories and your wide-eyed innocent act, I've had enough! I'm tired of it, Yagami-kun! You will not act like you're stupid, because I already know you're not. I know you know what could have happened, and I know you know I know! So just _tell me the truth!"_

 _"Stop!"_ Light cried out and L froze. Somewhere during his rant, he had gotten to his feet and yanked Light up by the collar, Misa's jacket discarded at his trembling feet. The brunet was grasping L's hands with his own, trying in vain to loosen his grip as his face turned splotchy pink.

L immediately dropped him, mortified, and the slender teenager burst into tears.

"I don't know what you're talking about! I don't know, I swear! Please, I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" The boy wept, burying his face in his hands.

The detective wasn't sure what to do. He had never seen Light cry before (but then again, he had never kidnapped Light, brutally injured his fiancé or aggressively threatened him before). "Raito-kun…I-I didn't mean to touch you, I'm sorry. It was in the heat of the moment."

"I h-haven't lied to you, I swear it, please don't hurt me!" The boy shook with the force of his sobs, his head not lifting from his uncomfortably bound hands.

"Y-you haven't lied to me, per se…you've only…hidden the truth from me. And…you must know I know about the scar, you felt me touch it." The scar he'd found, Light was obviously aware of its existence. L only wanted some help figuring things out. Raito had always been his intellectual partner, it was frustrating having him be an obstacle when it was most important. "I would never hurt you, Raito. I want to know what's going on, that's all. Just…don't cry, Raito-kun, I apologise."

Light didn't reply, his sobs dissolving until they were silent but for the sound of him gasping for air. Matt knelt beside him, shooting L a disapproving look as he put his arms around him, letting him lean in and hiccup onto his shoulder.

Awkwardly, L decided to retreat, crossing his arms over his chest. He slumped over to where BB was still soundly sleeping and squatted there. He could hear Matt crooning to the brunet all the way on the other side of the van. L sighed, trying not to pay them any attention.

It was only five minutes later that L realised Light had successfully managed to avoid telling the truth once again.

.

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A/N: Yay for the update! I hope you're liking it so far! Leave me a review if you are! :D


	6. Beyond

Chapter 6: Beyond

L was being an absolute idiot.

BB rolled restlessly on the floor of the van Mello affectionately called the L-mobile, itching for a bottle of strawberry jam. The jam had many uses, like making him look more like L pigging out on something sweet, and helping him distract himself from that terrible gnawing in the back of his skull. For the past one hundred and fifty days, a knot of a phantom headache had been blooming there, and it was driving him insane.

Amazingly enough, he hadn't spared the headaches a second thought when he had escaped his asylum with L. He had been preoccupied with his physical injuries, casually assuming they would fade once he got over his drug withdrawals. There'd been no reason to believe otherwise.

He didn't delude himself that he would get used to them anytime soon. Fucking L had no clue how it was to live with the remnants of torture, did he? He was a pampered shit who had lived inside a room all his life and was struggling to cope with the slightest changes.

BB wished he had gone through with his initial plans and murdered L all those years ago instead of those five random victims. At least then he wouldn't have been captured by the state of Shingata, and he wouldn't have this _niggling headache_ chewing away at his sanity.

Fucking L. Couldn't shoot in a straight line, couldn't plan out his missions right, couldn't even make sure that the kid they were attempting to break out was on the same page as the rest of them. Like fuck, he was _L_. He was supposed to be good at these things. BB would have made a better L than L himself any day. Fuck solving crimes, he would have brought down governments and sent people like Dr. Mikami Teru (fuck that guy) straight down the most painful path to Hell while he still had the power to.

The shuddering of the van shook BB out of his partial sleep, and the murderer groaned, sitting up. He was too tired to murder, he was too tired to do anything but follow orders. He was sure L was liking this side to him, the bastard liked to have everyone under his thumb, didn't he? BB was almost glad his plan to save his lover had failed. L needed some fucking tragedy, he deserved it.

He blinked away the remnants of sleep and surveyed the other occupants of the back of the van carefully. There was L, sitting alone in his trademark crouch like a spider-frog, his limbs all wrapped loosely around each other as he glowered fixedly at their captive.

Glowering, eh? That was a new development. Before BB's impromptu nap, L's face had been frozen into the most infuriatingly melancholy pout he had had the privilege to encounter. Glaring was a refreshing change, it made him only want to punch the detective across the nose rather than stick a knife into his eyeball.

BB glanced over at the object of his affections, the slim boy with the gangly limbs and pretty face, Light Yagami. So obviously a product of luxury, with his soft skin and shiny auburn hair, his damn haircut probably cost more than BB's jam supply for two months straight. The kid was sharp, he could tell that much. While L was busy sulking and Matt tapping away at a game on his phone to amuse himself, Yagami was observing everything around him. Discreetly, as if he didn't want anyone to know he was doing it. The brunet's eyes flicked from point to point, making tiny deductions about who they were, what their purpose was and how much trouble they would be in the minute he managed to escape and blabbed all the details to his asshole fiancé.

BB needed to silence this guy. Ideally, he would stab the fuck out of him, but considering L would likely kick him out of his care and/or shoot him in the head if he did, he put it off. No use throwing himself onto the streets in this condition. Maybe after he figured out how to neutralise the headache…

 _Damn it, L_. He was supposed to be a smart person, why was he kidnapping nobles? BB couldn't be caught messing with the nobles, not again. Why was he doing this?

There was a screech, and the van jerked to a halt, sending all of its occupants clattering like dominoes. Their captive was worst off, unable to catch himself as he fell forward, but luckily for him Matt the Good Samaritan was there to help him out, putting one strong arm around him for support.

Ready to be disgusted, BB took a glimpse at L, expecting the detective to be on his feet already at his alleged lover's beck and call…but to his bewilderment, the pale man hadn't moved an inch, his glare not dropping its venom.

L was angry with his prize? BB hadn't expected that. L was the kind of person who put his emotions away to work on a puzzle, not channel his anger into the solution like B…which meant now L would just sulk for three days straight and refuse any food but blueberry cheesecake while he contemplated on the problem of his Raito-kun. It was what he always did after a conflict.

Matt cleared his throat, pattering away at his phone. "So Mello's doing the perimeter check. He says it'll be a minute."

L shrugged apathetically, already starting off the sulking process, much to BB's exasperation. The serial killer used the support of the backpack mountain beside him to stand, stomping over to the rest of them resolutely.

Matt gave him a once-over, barely looking up from his game. L, to his credit, shifted imperceptibly so he was propping himself up on his hands, his legs bent in front of him in a defensive Capoeira stance, ready for BB to attack. Lucky for him, the serial killer was feeling more than a little down at the moment, preferring to just get all this over with so that he could take a nice long nap in an actual bed with two or three painkillers clenched between his teeth.

"Get up." He said shortly to their captive, who glanced up at him in surprise, as if he hadn't expected him to approach him at all.

Strangely, BB noticed that the fear didn't flood his eyes immediately. The first thing that flashed in those dark-gold irises was contempt, contempt and smug satisfaction. _How odd._ It only lasted for a split second, replaced easily by the most genuine-looking terror, leaving the murderer wondering if he had seen anything at all.

"I said get up." BB said, loathe to bend over and deal with the boy himself.

The brunet finally decided to comply, rolling his legs under himself and attempting to stand, Matt predictably rushing to his side and giving him a helping hand. When he was finally on his feet, standing a good head shorter than the black-haired killer, BB whipped out the thick blindfold he had fashioned out of one of Amane Misa's sashes and spun him around, tying it tightly over his eyes. "Remember, I'm only keeping you alive as a favour to L. Any funny business and I will not hesitate to relieve you of your head."

And there it was again. Before the boy bit his lip nervously, there was a flicker of another emotion. His mouth curved up on one side for a split second, a mocking, scornful smirk.

Before the murderer could act on that, possibly throw the kid against the wall and sock him across the face, Matt interjected.

"Is this really necessary, B? It's _Light_. I know you haven't met him before, but I can vouch for him-"

"No, it's not." A quiet voice piped up, a voice BB hadn't even realised belonged to L until he shuffled towards them. "This isn't Light. B's right, we have to take precautions."

"But L, he's still the same person. You know who Light was. Come on." Matt spread his hands. "Don't be an asshole, we're already scaring the shit out of him."

 _Ugh_. BB was just about to sneer at him when there was a tiny cough from the young man he was gripping firmly by the arm.

"Thank you, Matt, but it's alright." Light Yagami smiled faintly. "I'll cooperate."

Reverse psychology worked wonders on Mail Jeevas, evidently, because Light's declaration had the redhead turning a deep shade of puce. Luckily for BB, before Matt could open his mouth and spew out more nauseatingly sentimental bullshit, the doors of the van were flung open, a leather-clad blonde standing in front of them with his hands on his hips.

"What the fuck were you yelling about this whole time? Driving with you is _hell_. You fucks couldn't text me a single word?" Mello demanded, giving them his trademark bloodthirsty glare.

BB smirked. "Right, no. You guys deal with this one. I'll go secure the prisoner."

"Prisoner?" The blonde gaped as BB dragged Light stumbling out of the van behind him. "Is that _Light?_ What did you _do_ to him?"

BB snickered emptily as he yanked the captive along. "Go ahead, L, explain!" He called over his shoulder as he made his way into the headquarters.

The minute they entered the ramshackle building, BB sighed with relief. It looked like Misa wasn't there yet. While he did love the chaos that followed her, the distress when she realised her precious Raito didn't recognise her was going to be sickening. He saw Watari peeking out at him from the kitchen, headphones still on as he presumably continued his research on Near.

BB knew for a fact that Watari had baked a prospective cake for Light's return, so it was a refreshing change that the old man didn't show a single ounce of emotion, quietly withdrawing back into his room and resuming the work he had been doing.

The serial killer hauled Yagami into one of the spare rooms of the squat little headquarters, shoving him down beside the heavy shelf holding their food supplies and pulling out his duct tape. At the sound of the tape ripping free, Light flinched.

"Wait. Don't."

BB snickered. "But I want to." He snarked, pulling out a long length of tape and grabbing the brunet's upper arm. To his annoyance, the boy jerked out of his grip, his mouth set in a straight line.

 _"Don't."_

The serial killer raised his eyebrows, amused. "Excuse me? Are you giving me orders? Am I displeasing your noble being?" He leaned in close. "Listen, kid, you don't know who you're messing with. You have no clue. Don't provoke me or I'll stop giving a shit what L says, you got that?"

To his bafflement, of all the reactions the teenager could have had while being half his size and at his mercy, Light Yagami laughed. Softly and charmingly, mockingly, with his head tilted ever so slightly to the side and a cool smile on his lips.

The blood rushed to BB's head, and the pinch of his headache twanged with pain. His own lips stretched into a psychotic grin. "Oh, you're a cute little fucker, aren't you?" He raised his fist, ready to loosen a few of those straight white teeth. "Let's drive some sense into that pretty head of yours."

His fist was about to fly before Light smirked. "Oh yes, let's play. Let's see which one of us breaks first, _Beyond Birthday."_

BB stilled, his bewilderment converting to fury. _"How the fuck do you know my name?_ " The serial killer drew his knife. "Answer me, bitch! How the _fuck_ did you find out?" _He had to kill him now. He couldn't have a noble walking around knowing where he was, with all the police after him he was sure to be caught!_

 _He couldn't go back!_

Light seemed to be able to read his thoughts, cocking his head to the side tauntingly. "Try it. Try to hurt me, I dare you."

"Oh, I will, believe me." The murderer snarled, eyeing the brunet's flat stomach.

Light took a deep breath. "Birthday-san, in the most respectful way possible…fuck off." A tiny smile to reinforce the insult.

BB glowed with rage, raising his knife like a tribal shaman over his human sacrifice. _"You pathetic little-"_

Light laughed. "Four-five-one-two-zero-eight."

The murderer dropped his knife with a clatter and collapsed to the ground.

.

.

A/N: Hahaha I love it when Light gets to be crafty XD review and comment please!


	7. Deal

Chapter 7: Deal

As usual, they all underestimated the mate.

Light wasn't sure why they did it. Did people forget mates were given the same education as the rest of them up to high school? Did they forget that they're just as human as the nobles on the other end of the treaty? Did it just slip their minds that some of them are capable of being intellectually superior to others?

Well, they probably forgot the last one at least, because using the insultingly simple nickname "BB" around the son of the Chief of Police of Shingata and fiancé of one of the world's best criminal neurosurgeons was just stupid unless they considered him a retard. Which other psychopath with the initials BB had escaped prison within this year?

Perhaps, if Light had been a little less interested in the criminal justice system (or if Beyond Birthday hadn't been such an interesting case study), he could have gotten away with it. But unfortunately, living with Mikami was boring so Light took every escape he could, most especially studying the psychotic inmates that had laid on the neurosurgeon's operating table.

Voice-activated neurostimulation had been of particular interest to him for a while now: sticking a charge into the inmate's brain and having it manipulate the neural signals on call, it was highly unethical in any other country and particularly cruel, but nutty Shingata was a free-for-all, they didn't give a single shit about the rights of criminals.

The stimulators were supposed to prevent criminals from escaping, and Beyond Birthday, the infamous serial killer who had been committed to an asylum due to a judicial misfire, was given a Grade 3 charge, one of the most powerful ones on the charts. Just as well that he had managed to escape anyway.

The brunet let out a breath, annoyed with the blindfold covering his eyes. He had planned to use his secret advantage at a later time, preferably when his life showed signs of being in danger, but he couldn't stand being tied up any longer. His shoulders ached just from having his wrists bound, it was getting to the point of torture. Light was just a soft little noble, he wasn't built for all this.

If he waited much longer, he ran the risk of having someone come check on them. His scheme counted on having BB alone with him. "Two-one-one-six."

He heard the murderer shift heavily in his spot, promptly waking up. Neurostimulation would probably have a terrible effect on his alertness and mental functions. He already saw how it gave criminals headaches on a regular basis. They were certainly not a good thing, however fascinating they may be.

"Take my blindfold off." Light commanded, and he heard the murderer groan in response.

"W-what the fuck did you do?" He asked groggily.

The brunet smirked. "If you want me to explain, take my blindfold off."

BB finally seemed to come to his senses, and Light heard the scrape of metal as the murderer picked up his knife. "You little brat-" He began, but the teenager interrupted him.

"I will do it again, Beyond Birthday, or I will choose to intensify your headache permanently instead. Put the weapon down."

That earned a pause. Light smiled. To think the black-haired man had been trying to keep his pain a secret, it was painfully obvious to anyone with half a brain looking for it.

"What did you _do_ to me, Yagami?" The serial killer sounded like he was tripping unsteadily about the room. "I can't fucking stand, what the hell-"

Light felt so damn smug. "Don't worry, it's temporary. Your brain is readjusting to the chip, nobody's used it in a while." He smirked, deciding a monologue was in order. "See, I never attended college, but my fiancé Mikami was nice enough to bring me material to study. The subject I specialised in was criminal neurosurgery as a theoretical concept. To put it simply, I know seventeen different voice-activated coded functions for that chip in your brain. One to put you to sleep, one to wake you, and fifteen levels of pain."

There was an extended pause, and the murderer snarled. "Well, I'll just have to gag you before I skewer the fuck out of you-"

"Not so fast." Light said condescendingly as a shiver that ran down his spine. _Fuck, he hadn't thought of that._ "You sure don't know much about neurostimulation, do you? The code doesn't have to be verbal, I can tap it on the ground or even sniff the right number of times and you'll die in permanent agony." The brunet crossed his fingers, hoping the murderer was as inexperienced as he thought he was and didn't see through that bucket of lies.

Luck seemed to be shining on Light, because the serial killer grumbled, irked. "Of course. Of _course_ I have to get stuck in this mess. I am going to _kill_ L-"

Light flashed his most winning smile. "No need to view this so negatively. This can benefit both of us. All I need you to do is keep this a secret from your friends and stay on retainer for me. I'll need you to help me escape when I get the opportunity, but until then all you need to do for me is be nice."

"And how does that benefit me?" BB's voice was wary, cautious.

Light grinned, particularly proud of himself.

"Well, not to brag or anything, but you're looking at the youngest person who has ever successfully disabled a neurostimulation chip."

…

"Where's Raito-kun? Misa has to see him! Let Misa see him this minute! _Where is he?"_

L speared a blueberry with his fork and stuck it in his mouth apathetically. "I wish I could tell you, Amane-san, but I do not know where Raito-kun is either." He drawled to himself, scooping up a bite of cheesecake on his fork.

Misa had arrived a few minutes too late, storming into the headquarters the very minute BB had shut the door of the spare room with Light in it. The idea of BB in a room alone with L's lover was worrying, to say the least, but he knew his successor wasn't going to hurt him (if he did, L would shoot him in the face). It left L alone with Mello and Matt, and the detective had quit social interaction for the day, resigning himself to a piece of blueberry cheesecake as he pondered on what to do about Light.

He hadn't expected this, not in his wildest dreams. He hadn't expected the government to operate on a _noble_ , especially with such an obviously experimental procedure. And why could they have done it? Because Light had run away from Mikami?

Did Mikami pull strings to get his fiancé back in any shape and form?

Dr. Mikami Teru. The most cruel man he had ever seen, and L had seen his fill of despicable people. What he had done to BB and probably Near was bad enough, but hurting Light was a step too far. Mikami better watch his back, the minute L got out of the country and rebuilt his connections, he was going to come down on him with all his strength, he was going to make sure there was nothing left of him when he was done.

L sucked another piece of creamy cake. _Oh, when he escaped the country…_

"Misa needs to apologise for what happened at the party! Please, tell Misa where he is!"

The black-haired man raised his eyes to study the jittery blond model, licking his spoon free of dessert. "Go bother Mello and Matt, Amane-san."

"Matt and Mello are busy, they won't talk to Misa! _Please_ , L-san!"

L let out an aggravated sigh. "Raito-kun is not himself right now. You cannot meet him. Please go away. I am attempting to figure out what to do with him and you are not helping."

"What to _do_ with him?" Misa's voice rose to a cry. "What do you mean?"

"Amane-san, do not interfere-"

L was interrupted by a loud, shrill shriek coming from the other side of the house. The detective's head snapped up and he was on his feet before he registered it, bounding towards the storeroom with his heart pounding a hundred miles in his chest.

He threw the door open with a bang and yelled at the top of his lungs. "B, don't you _dare-!"_

L stopped, struck dumb. It wasn't Light screaming after all. Or rather it was, but the shriek he had heard in the other room was coming from Beyond himself.

"You fucking _asshole!_ " Light shouted until he was red in the face, sitting propped up against a nearby shelf. "I wasn't asking for much! All I wanted was a little cooperation! It was a _good deal!_ You're not getting the deal back, you can rot in hell! You can suffer until you die in agony!"

L looked from Light to Beyond and back. The serial killer was clutching his hair in clumps, howling like a banshee as he raked his nails down his face. The detective heard an inflection in the screams and realised that they were words. He was screaming for Light to _stop it._

"What's happening?" A voice came from behind him, and L glanced over to see the entire troupe, Mello, Matt and Watari standing there, all stunned.

Watari gulped, shaken. "What on Earth is going on, L?"

L shrugged, at a loss of what to do. Neither Light nor Beyond had realised they were there, the brunet being blindfolded and the former successor too hysterical to comprehend anything. What was this? _Telepathy?_ L's eyes widened with the implications of that. Telepathy wasn't even _possible!_ But how else could Light possibly be doing this to Beyond? What the hell had Mikami done to his brain?

"You short-sighted idiot, I can't believe you're this stupid! I literally just told you what I could do!" Light ranted, and L had a flash of déjà vu. This had to be his Light, there was no other human being who could hold so much disgust in so few words. "Idiots, I'm always stuck with idiots. I'm never switching that off, you understand? You can drive yourself insane for all I care!"

BB let out a whimper, clutching his head tight in his hands, and behind him Mello gasped. BB never whimpered, it went against his entire persona. "Please…" The murderer mewled. "Please, it hurts…"

He was really suffering. Whatever Light was doing to him, it had to be horrendous for _B_ to be suffering. L stepped forward, ready to interject, but before he could rush to either of the two inside the room, a force of nature pushed past him in a flash of blond hair, and another piercing squall joined the rest.

"Raito! _Raito-kuuun!"_ Amane Misa cried as she sprinted towards Light's huddled figure and knelt by him, whipping off his blindfold in one fluid movement. The brunet blinked rapidly, taken aback by the sudden light, then settled his amber gaze on L. He sighed vexedly.

"Oh. Right, of course this would have garnered attention. I'd figured the great Beyond Birthday would have taken me to a relatively soundproof location, but I guess he can't even do _that_ right." Light darted a glare at the murderer, who was stumbling obliviously about in a circle and wailing.

Before L could respond to that, Misa hugged the slim teenager tightly to herself. "What did they do to you, Raito-kun? How dare they tie you up? Misa will get you free and comfortable in a second, you just wait." The model started to work on picking apart the ends of the duct tape that bound Light's wrists together.

The brunet's puzzlement flashed over his eyes for a split second before he moulded his face into a picture of relieved joy. "Oh, um. Oh, God, I'm so glad you're saving me! I don't know what I've done for them all to torture me like this!" Struck by his words, Misa grabbed him in another breathless hug, squealing her indignation. Over her shoulder, Light's façade slipped and he smirked widely.

This was his Light, damn it. This plotting, scheming, two-faced creature was his Light exactly. It was killing him.

L gritted his teeth, loping towards Misa and attempting to pry her away from the teenager. "Amane-san, you have no idea what's going on. Get out."

"No, Misa!" Light cried out, sounding so distressed that L almost stopped to ask if he was alright. "Misa, don't leave me with him! He wants to hurt me! Untie me, Misa!"

The detective pursed his lips. "Raito-kun, I swear to God…"

"Get away from him, you monster!" Misa screeched. "Don't you dare touch him! After the torture he must have gone through in his old home, you dare to treat him this way? Misa will protect you, Raito, Misa won't let L get an inch close to- _hey!"_

L breathed a sigh of relief. Mello and Matt had finally broken out of their stupors to contribute to the action, Mello grabbing Misa by the arms to wrench her away and Matt running over to BB to attempt to calm him down.

"Misa, for fuck's sake, stop wriggling! You're so damn annoying, I don't know why we put up with you!" Mello growled, yanking her back as she screeched and bucked.

Light, for his part, did not drop the act. "No! No, don't leave me! He's going to hurt me, he's going to torture me! He said so! Help me, Misa!" His wrists strained against the tape as he shouted, raising them as if to shield himself from the detective looming over him.

L felt equal parts irritation and hope. Irritation because this drama was so typical of Light, and hope for the exact same reason. "Raito-kun, that's more than enough. If you continue with this terrible charade any longer, I'm afraid my ears may start to bleed."

"Be glad I don't have a knife or you'll know exactly how that feels." Light hissed. He then proceeded to shut his mouth with a snap, visibly morphing his expression from hateful to traumatised. "…I mean, please d-don't hurt me!"

L couldn't help but laugh, trying to squash the affection from his voice and failing. "Drop it, sweetheart. Misa's not a valuable ally, you must know that."

The brunet looked mortified. "Wha-what…? Who the hell do you think you're calling that?"

L blushed. "Um." He hadn't realised. _Sweetheart_. "I didn't mean…"

"And it's not like I have a wide variety of allies, you know. You can't blame me for trying." Light said irritably.

L dropped to a crouch beside the boy, burying slim white fingers into his thick auburn hair, and it seemed the brunet had gotten used to him doing that because he didn't even blink. "I am an ally, sweet-, uh, Raito-kun." _Damn it, if he called him that one more time…_ "We're all your allies. We want to help you get better, I promise. None of us have ill intentions."

"Yeah, that's why I'm tied up here, aren't I? That's why your good friend BB was likely going to slash my throat open minutes ago, isn't it?"

L gritted his teeth together. B was going to get it today. "BB was going to hurt you? Why?"

 _"Hurt_ me? He was going to stick me through the heart. He was going to _murder_ me, like the murderer he is!"

 _Murderer_. The pale man exhaled. "You figured out his real name."

"It isn't hard." Light spat. L chuckled fondly.

"No, it isn't. But then we weren't looking to hide it from you, you're supposed to already know it."

The brunet flushed scarlet. "Well, I didn't and now I do, and your friend tried to _murder_ me in cold blood for it so don't you tell me you're looking out for me! You're not on my side, you fucking kidnapper! I didn't ask for your help, and sure as hell would never have because I'll probably _die_ by the end of this-"

L just managed to stop himself from instinctively kissing his Raito into silence, opting for a hand over his mouth instead. Light was enraged, his eyes widening, but before he could let out another stream of furious words L spoke in the flatly monotonous tone he always used around Angry Raito.

"Let's have ourselves a little compromise, shall we, Raito-kun?" The detective smiled in what he hoped was a friendly manner. With Raito's unsettled expression, though, it probably wasn't. "I recognise that I cannot keep you tied up like this indefinitely, it wouldn't be practical for a person in my position. However, you must also recognise that I cannot let you go."

"Why _not?"_ Light hissed. "I won't talk-"

 _"Because,_ Raito-kun." L groaned, aggravated. "Because no matter what you may believe, Dr. Mikami is a dangerous man who has mutilated you for life. I cannot let you go back to him."

That shut him up. The teenager's brows furrowed down as he considered it.

"I know you know it, Raito-kun." L said softly. "I understand that you may be suppressing the thought, but it is the truth. I don't know how or why he did what he did, but in good faith, I cannot let you return."

The brunet bit his lip. "No, L, you're wrong. If you're talking about that scar you felt, Mikami didn't give it to me."

"Then who did?" The detective asked curiously, earning a sigh in response.

Light dipped his head. "Look, all that matters is that Mikami would never hurt me, alright? He respects me, he cares about me. If you think you're somehow helping me by doing this, you're wrong."

L curled his hands into fists. He had a good mind to just explode and tell Light all about the abuse the doctor had inflicted on the teenager before he'd had run away and met L nearly a year ago, but that would achieve nothing but denial. _Nice going, Mikami Teru. Nice job erasing all your mistakes and starting over._

The detective shrugged. "Let's agree to disagree. I don't think you're going to see sense anytime soon. In the meantime, as to your predicament, I shall offer you a choice. Either we keep you tied up in here until we find a way to cure you, or…" L paused.

"Or?" Light prompted apprehensively, his brown eyes wide and sparkling.

L slowly smirked, sticking his hand in his pocket and pulling out a pair of handcuffs separated by a two metre-long chain.

The brunet cocked his head. "And this is not the same thing because…?"

In answer, L snapped one end of the handcuffs onto his own wrist.

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A/N: Always loved the handcuffs :) Review and comment!


	8. Criminal

L knew Light wasn't used to taking gambles on people like him.

The people he manipulated in his own life were a lot more like Misa, happy-go-lucky and relatively thoughtless, easy to manoeuvre in whatever direction he wanted. Even Beyond was a better candidate to make a deal with: despite his unpredictability, he was still understandable.

L wasn't understandable. At least not yet, not while Light was still figuring out his motives. Not to underestimate him, L would never make that mistake, but he _wasn't_ going to figure it out, not until he got his memories back. It wasn't possible to understand why L wanted him back so badly without seeing who they were to each other before.

Light was uncomfortable in his handcuff, he noticed, massaging his wrist and darting glances at L every now and then, cautiously, as if waiting for him to take advantage of him. L tried not to feel offended (what was the deal with people calling him a pervert? He hadn't done anything to warrant that…).

The detective waved a hand in front of Light's face. "Anytime now would be nice, Raito-kun. He looks like he's going to die in ten seconds."

L wasn't joking. The murderer was, at the moment, twitching on the ground, his red eyes glassy and bulging as he tugged weakly at his thin dyed hair.

The teenager raised his deep brown eyes to meet his. L felt a sudden craving for milk chocolate. "What stops you from tying me up again after I release him? How can I be sure you won't go back on your deal?"

"You can't." L was glad he had sent Mello and Matt away in an attempt to make Light more comfortable. Mello would have flown off the handle at this dithering. "You trust me enough to handcuff yourself to me, so trust me to not to lie to you."

"I'm not handcuffed to you because I trust you." Light gave him a withering look. "Besides, if I help your brother, he's likely going to repay me by skewering the fuck out of me, if I remember it right."

L felt a twinge of anger in his chest. If BB was still his successor, that little wisecrack would have had Watari give him seven hours of detention. "He's not my brother. He isn't even related to me." He snorted. "And secondly, as long as you are in my custody, we share the same fate. That means I shall protect you with my life, and in return, any attempt by you to kill me will result in Watari initiating your own death."

Light nodded sharply, disguising his expression with a blank mask. "I understand." He took a deep breath. "You've given me your word, L. I hope that means something."

L pursed his lips. "It does, Raito-kun. Now please, before BB leaves the mortal realm."

Light nodded again. "Yeah. Okay." He sighed. "Four-five-one-two-zero-eight."

The serial killer convulsing on the floor suddenly grew very still, his eyes slipping shut as his breathing evened out. L lifted his hand to his mouth and bit hard at his thumbnail, impressed. "Neurostimulation, Raito-kun?" So it wasn't telepathy after all. Just Light Yagami's trademark resourcefulness.

A slight smile appeared on the brunet's face. "Two-one-one-six."

The minute BB stirred L leapt onto him, the handcuffs towing Light forward. "What's this I hear about you trying to stab Raito-kun to death, B?" He hissed into his ear. BB moaned, shoving him off of him.

"Damn it, L, don't get in my face. Jesus."

L snarled. "Answer me, you wretched excuse for a successor. What did I make you promise before taking you in?"

"I know, okay?" The murderer grumbled. "But he knows my name! And he was trying to sell me a bunch of lies, he was planning to escape and shit and I just…I lost it. I'm sorry."

Light's mouth dropped open faux-indignantly. "I did _not_ lie."

BB raised an eyebrow. "You told me you're the youngest person to ever disable a neurostimulation chip. If I'm not mistaken, for a nobleman that would come with a few pesky things like _fame_. Just because we're fugitives doesn't mean we're cut off from the world."

The brunet turned cotton-candy pink. "Yeah, you think it's all so simple-"

L sighed. "Please don't start, Raito-kun. I have it memorised." He gave a weary glance. "Light is a mate. If at all he has learnt to disable neurostimulation chip in the seven months we have been apart, he would have done it in secret, under Dr. Mikami's supervision. He wouldn't have earned fame, that defeats the point of the Nobleman's Treaty."

The murderer was silent for a bit, then rolled his head back, sitting up. "So, you can actually take my chip out, then?"

Light's answer was abrupt, unforgiving. "No."

"No? I thought you said you didn't lie." BB said, scarlet eyes glinting dangerously.

Undeterred, Light smirked. "You refused my deal, Beyond Birthday. I'm not giving scum like you a second chance."

BB did not move, but L observed his muscles tense as he grinned widely, his teeth sparkling. "Sorry, I didn't hear you right. Did you just say you _can_ take it out, but you won't?"

"Yeah, that's exactly what I said. You should have thought twice before rejecting my offer." The teenager narrowed his eyes arrogantly. "I wouldn't think of associating with people like you unless I get something out of it."

"Is that right?" The successor's voice was soft, menacing. "I see. You don't need to use me anymore, you managed to get L and his handcuffs. Did you know he's used these on you before? Mello told me all about it, that was one wild night the two of you had. Mello said you hadn't wanted to in the beginning, but you came around eventually." He shrugged mock-casually.

L raised his eyebrows, peeved. _At least he wasn't openly attacking yet._ "That's enough, B. We'll deal with your chip and whatever else they put in your brain, I promise. You've done enough here, and you've violated our agreement. Go help Watari with the Near investigation before I change my mind."

"Sure, sure." BB snickered as he got to his feet and began to saunter out. "No problem." L and Light watched him warily as he passed by them on his way out, and L breathed a sigh of relief.

"Congratulations, Raito-kun. You have succeeded at initiating one of B's plans for world domination."

Light shook his head. "I was never going to help him. I've read his file. If anyone deserves a chip in his head..."

"I don't know about that. I don't think anyone deserves a neurostimulation chip. It is a brutal philosophy to follow."

The brunet hugged his elbows. "It's effective on a large scale. Killers like him deserve whatever they get, in my opinion."

"Yes, you've always held that opinion." L smiled. "Since when did you become so interested in neurosurgery?"

The teenager gave him a once-over. "I've always been interested in the theoretical aspects of it. The surgical part was a side-effect of Mikami. He let me watch his surgeries and practice on models." The brunet's smile held a wistful quality to it. "He was very encouraging through it all. He really wanted to make us work, give us something in common. And then there was that emergency extraction, one of the criminals was getting multiple severe seizures and Mikami was out of the country for a conference. He talked me through the operation and I got it out. I saved the guy's life." He laughed. "If we had lived anywhere but Shingata, that would have been a criminal offence."

L felt a throb of pain in his thumb and realised he had started to nibble the skin around his fingernail. "Yes, Mikami is the dream husband, isn't he?" He said, a touch of irony poisoning his words. If he narrated even a fraction of what the old Light had told him…

Light stopped laughing, his face going grave. "Why in the fuck am I telling you this? You _shot_ him. I don't even know if he's dead or alive. You consort with his patients, for God's sake."

The detective sighed deeply. "You don't have to worry, Raito-kun. He's not dead." He shrugged. "Men as evil as Dr. Mikami Teru don't die easily."

There was a beat, two beats. L had almost concluded that the teenager hadn't heard him when a hard fist smashed him in the face. The raven-haired man flew off his feet, hitting the ground with a painful thud, and Light followed suit, tumbling off balance and crashing into him, pulled by the handcuffs. On instinct, the detective stuck his leg out, catching the brunet on the cheekbone and throwing him off.

He knew Light would lunge for him again, he had never stood being second place, so L took preventive measures, grabbing him by the collar and yanking him off balance. "Raito-kun. Calm yourself."

"Fuck you! You have no right to speak of Mikami that way!" He bellowed. "You have no right to speak of him at all!"

L took a deep breath. "Okay, Raito-kun. I understand."

 _"Bullshit!_ You'd never understand, I couldn't _begin_ to explain how lucky I am to have Mikami as a mate. You can crib about how he does his job or how many criminals he's tortured, but he is a _good man_. He would never hurt anyone who hasn't done something to deserve it! And if you tell me Beyond Birthday, who hung a woman from the ceiling by her guts while she was still alive, doesn't deserve it, I don't know what to tell you!"

L focussed on his breaths. _In, out, in, out_. No point getting mad at Raito-kun, he wasn't the same person, he didn't have the same memories. No point, no point. "It's all a matter of perspective. I happen to consider some atrocities, such as invading the mind of a person and controlling their actions, reprehensible to say the least. As you said yourself, if we were anywhere but Shingata, it would be against the law."

"Well, we aren't outside Shingata, are we? You can't blame Mikami for that."

He couldn't control the annoyance colouring his pale cheeks pink. "What about his vigilante work, then? Can I blame him for that? You must know about it. How he operates on criminals who haven't been tried, or who have been tried but were declared innocent? Is that your precious law, Raito-kun? Do you think that is a criminal neurosurgeon's job?"

"They deserve it." Light lifted his chin obstinately. "The justice system is flawed but Mikami-"

Contempt burned like spice down his throat. "He has taken my successor. Near is in his custody for no fault of his. He was simply in the wrong place at the wrong time, and your fiancé passed judgement on him. He has done _nothing_ wrong, apart from being an orphan who happened to live in a shady neighbourhood. Now he's probably in the same state as Beyond or worse. I haven't heard from him in months." He gritted his teeth. "He has taken _everything_ from me, Yagami Raito. He's taken my lover, my successor, several of my chances at freedom. So don't you argue that he is a good man. He is just as much a criminal as the people in his operation theatre."

There was an extended silence.

Light cleared his throat uncomfortably and L gazed at him. His auburn head was tilted slightly forward, his long fringe drooping into his caramel eyes. It was like they were meeting again. L remembered having arguments like this all the time with him, though never on the topic of Mikami.

This Light was just a softer, more innocent version of his Raito, a version who had failed to escape his castle, a version who faced an entirely different set of struggles than the man who had come to him a year ago demanding a gun and tickets for a ship to England.

"I'm…I'm sorry about your…successor. I can't imagine how it would feel to have someone I love on Mikami's table, especially if he's not guilty." The brunet finally said.

L shrugged it off. "It's not your fault. Near was the idiot who got captured. We're working on rescuing him, though that is quite a task. Mikami is good at hiding people."

"Yeah, I guess so." Light whispered, his gaze boring a hole into the floor.

L watched him for a bit, chewing contemplatively on his stubby thumbnail.

"Come with me, Raito-kun." The detective turned around, tugging his lover out of the spare room by the chain of the handcuff. "Let's get some work done before bed."

.

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A/N: Whew, it's been a while. Feed me with comments, it helps me remember to upload more often! :)


	9. Intuition

Light had a reputation for being right.

He was famous for it, back at home, even when he was a little kid. It was so ingrained into his character that back in his early teens his father used to come to him with the files of cold cases and give them to him to study to get his opinion.

His instincts had been infallible, it was a fact. It had stayed that way for a decade and a half.

Starting from the day his father had told him about the sectioning, though, they had gone completely awry. All the situations he thought should be inappropriate were suddenly acceptable. Whenever he felt threatened, there was no threat in sight. Maybe it was the effect of growing up, maybe it was a response to the trauma of losing all his hopes and dreams, but whatever it was, it was highly inconvenient because he could no longer have full confidence in his decisions.

Like now, for example. Ever since he had been trapped by someone he knew was working with a serial killer, ever since he had met the man who called himself Ryuuzaki Rue, his intuition had been playing him a soothing, comforting love song. It was ridiculous.

It fit in perfectly with L's story. Romeo and Juliet reunited, happiness and freedom, _trust him, trust him, trust him_. It made no sense, just look at him! Look at his repulsive posture, his choppy, messy hair, his dark circles, his ghastly complexion. Look at his audacity, breaking into his house, throwing a _rock_ through his window. Even if their story was true, even if Light really had lost his memories, would he really have associated with this…this _thing?_ How desperate must he have been to go for this weird, misshapen frog-man who looked at least five years older than himself?

Even as he sat in the office chair behind the detective with one wrist shackled like a dog on a leash, even as he observed all of the man's colleagues whispering to each other about what to do with him, even as L looked back at him with that knowing smirk on his face, as if smugly gloating about the brunet's downfall…

Even then, his intuition told him to trust him.

"Does Raito-kun feel sick?"

The words caught him by surprise, as if he had expected something else from that glassy, soulless midnight stare. L cocked his head, his bangs falling into his huge dark eyes. "Would Raito-kun be feeling tired? It is very late into the night, and he would perhaps already be in bed under regular circumstances."

Light's eyes flicked to the other man's screen, glowing white in the relatively shadowy room. Spreadsheets and spreadsheets of information, they were trying to break into the records of the Shingata asylums. Most of the so-called successors had gone to bed a couple minutes ago. Only an old man sat at the other table, with a china cup of tea beside his keyboard as he pattered away, a pair of half-moon spectacles on his nose.

 _What on Earth was this prim little old man like that doing with these psychopaths?_

"Raito-kun seems distracted. Perhaps I should move my work to our room?" L questioned.

Light jerked his head up, startled. "Our room?"

The detective cracked a smile, and Light felt like cracking his knuckles across his face. "Yes. How did you expect the handcuffs to work, otherwise?"

The teenager tried to quell the panic rising in him. "Um, I'm sorry, but can't you just tie me up somewhere instead?"

"I asked you to make a choice. You did not choose that one. Perhaps you should have thought it through more carefully, I have already made arrangements and am loathe to change them."

Colour rose to Light's face. "You pervert. You're enjoying this, aren't you? Having a teenage kid at your mercy? And a noble to boot, does it make you feel manly?"

L's pink tongue darting out to lick the pale-blue lollipop he held in his hand. "I am deeply offended that you have such misconceptions of my intentions, Raito-kun. I cannot have you escape. I know how craftily you scheme so I will chain you to myself. It is the simplest logical solution. I am sorry for the inconvenience."

"Sorry for the inconvenience my ass." Light spat. "Who do you think you're fooling? I knew this was coming, I knew it from the minute you took me. What I don't understand is this whole charade before this."

"It's not a charade-" L began, but Light would not be deterred.

"There are only limited reasons you would go to all this trouble to kidnap Mikami's mate, especially since you seem to have a personal vendetta against him. You don't seem to want his money, considering you tried to kill him, so I know the only thing it could be is to get your vengeance by hurting someone he loves. I know it is only a matter of time before you murder me, that would be the only way to get the police off your trail. And you'll probably rape me in the bargain-"

"Raito-kun!" The older man's voice was shocked and hurt, and Light's intuition cringed. _Trust him, trust him, trust him_. He was so tired, his head was aching, his limbs straining to stay tense.

"I don't see the need to pretend. I know your friends are waiting outside, I know you have some plan. I'm not going to fight back now, because I will gain nothing from a five on one fight but bruises, but the minute Mikami finds you, L-"

L flung his lollipop at him.

It hit his cheek and fell into his lap. Puzzled, Light picked it up between his fingers from where it had caused a sticky spot on his knee and looked up at him. "What-?"

The black-haired man was obviously seething, glaring silently at him with those enormous eyes.

The strangeness of that reaction disoriented him, but the brunet kept his jaw firm, eyes sharp with whatever righteous anger he could muster. What right did that man have to be offended after all he had done? "What, did you want it to be a secret? Did you want the shock value? Is that what the charade was for, foreplay to your perverted fantasies?"

Somebody cleared their throat violently, cutting him off. Light and L looked over their shoulders at the old man at the other desk, who was giving them a strict, disapproving look out of his blue eyes.

"Mr. Yagami." Slowly, the gentleman pushed his eyeglasses up his nose. "I advise you do not goad L further."

 _Goad?_ The brunet's mouth dropped open. "Excuse me-"

"Spare me the theatrics. We have all been through this once before, and you are bright enough to realise that already. How you choose to deal with this truth is your choice. If you remain in denial, so be it, but do not hurt my son in the process. This is your only warning."

The teenager was speechless, his face burning. What was this? Light was the wronged one, he was the victim here. How dare this man treat him like he's the aggressor? Nothing could be further from the truth!

Before Light could open his mouth, the handcuff chain at his wrist yanked him upright and sent him staggering a few steps forward out of his chair. He looked up to see L already standing near the doorway, his jaw set and lips in a pout as he carried his laptop under his arm. "Come." He commanded as he hauled him out of the workroom and up the stairs.

Light's wrist throbbed with pain as he stumbled behind L, trying to catch up to the pale man as he took the second door to the right in their squat little headquarters.

It was a bedroom, complete with a yellow lamp and a large bed right in the middle of it.

Light wanted to panic, looking at L as he set his laptop down on top of the mattress, his handcuff chain feeling like some sort of bondage kink…

"Come inside and shut the door." L barked, but then seemed to think better of it. "Or leave it open, whatever suits you. I don't care."

Light hesitated before he reached out and gently swung the thin plywood door shut. By the time he turned around again, he saw that L had settled down on the floor at the foot of the bed with his knees pressed against the chest, his laptop screen illuminating his face.

After a pause, Light walked over and stood doubtfully in front of him. "Um…are you going to sleep on the floor?"

"Yes. I hope this minimises the discomfort Raito-kun feels around me. I will not leave him to his own devices, I am not stupid, but I can afford to give him whatever comfort is within my capacities."

The polite well-brought-up Shingatese boy in him cringed. He hadn't meant to kick him out of his bed or anything, but this was for the best. After all, this way they wouldn't be sleeping together, literally or figuratively.

So why the fuck was his conscience telling him to apologise?

"Thank you." Light compromised, sitting down on the mattress. "For the consideration." A yawn swallowed his words. He'd probably slept three hours or so before L had invaded his home. He never felt right without six full hours of sleep. Reluctantly, the brunet turned the metal cuff around on his wrist and massaged the skin underneath. "Will you be chaining me to the bed? Once I'm asleep, you won't be able to go anywhere."

When Light looked down at the detective, he saw that the older man wore a wry smile, watching him out of enigmatic black eyes. L shook his head minutely, turning his attention back to his laptop. "Don't worry, Raito-kun. I'll deal with that when it comes up."

Light thought about protesting that evasion of an answer, but instead opted to roll his eyes and lie down on the bed, sighing with relief as the headache he didn't even know he'd had disappeared. "Alright. As long as you don't wake me." He mumbled, his thought starting to mesh together in his exhaustion.

"I certainly won't." L typed loudly and rhythmically on his laptop, the clicking soothing to listen to. "Goodnight, Raito-kun." Light felt his lids close, plunging him into darkness.

His instincts spoke for him. "Goodnight, Lawliet."

In his tired stupor, he didn't notice L jerk upright, staring at him with dumbfounded ping-pong-ball eyes. The lights dimmed, and he faded away into the shadows.

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A/N: Feed me with comments, it helps me remember to upload more often! :)


	10. Lawliet

In the midst of everything that could possibly be going wrong, the one thing that was preoccupying the detective's mind was how fast his heart was beating.

He hadn't had many opportunities for true fear, being an orphan raised within four walls and then an adult who had every one of his wishes catered to by Watari, but right now Watari was miles away, waiting for a car that would never come, and he was here in this horror show and his heart was thumping away to glory.

L was, for once in his life, completely and truly afraid.

He had so much more to lose now than when he was a child. He had escape within his grasp, a ship waiting for them to board only minutes away. It was not the imaginary embrace of his mother he was losing, it was Whammy's House. It was the idea of living in the rolling plains of Winchester with a brilliant, beautiful man on the porch of the grand English manor as the clouds gathered over the blue sky and soaked the grass, the smell of fresh mud overwhelming them as they laced fingers.

There were four people hiding under this table. Four people who were completely and undeniably fucked, and only one person whose fault it all was. L was supposed to be the prodigy, the future greatest detective in the world, but he hadn't bothered to check into the background of the contact who had hooked him up with the greatest advantage he had gotten since Shingata.

The traitor had been one of his contacts from England, one of his most trusted men. Oh, when he got back home, Aizawa would get it. He would realise what it meant to cross L…

He felt a warm hand enclose his and looked up to see Yagami Raito smiling ruefully up at him.

The light was muted, turning the boy's hair coppery brown and throwing shadows over his high cheekbones. There were times his Raito-kun simply took his breath away with how beautiful he was, and now was one of those times. "Hey. Don't obsess over it now. We need to focus on getting out, you can punish yourself later."

They were in an abandoned warehouse, underneath a rickety metal table that shielded them from potential snipers. Quite plainly, they were surrounded. Aizawa had ratted out on them, the cavalry had appeared with full intentions of capturing a troupe of alleged anarchists. There was no way out, they were completely surrounded.

The only way out was if one of them distracted the soldiers, somehow got their attention off of one of the windows so that they could slip into the nearby alley and escape detection that way. However, if they did that, the distraction would be captured for sure. There was no way to escape a police force that huge.

Evidently, all three of his companions had thought of this as well.

"L, look, one of us has to surrender and lie about being alone." Mello, Mihael Keehl, his second ranked successor said, pulling out the gun from his holster. "There isn't any other way. They have us surrounded."

As if on cue, one of the police officers outside the warehouse procured a loudspeaker from somewhere. _"We know you're in there, you bloody anarchists! The sooner you come out, the more mercy you'll be shown!"_

The first ranker, Near, twirled a finger in his dense white hair. "Let's look at this logically. Who is the best sacrifice out of us four?"

L felt a burning in his gut, as if his lunch was going to propel to his throat. "We aren't sacrificing anybody." If they were looking at it logically, there was only one conclusion they could come to. Only one of them was guaranteed survival upon being captured, but L wasn't going to lose him. He wasn't going to allow this.

And by the looks of it, that person knew it just as well.

"It can't be Mello." Near continued, unperturbed. "He's already on their radar with all the shit he does, there isn't any way the police will miss that when they arrest him."

 _"Near."_ L growled, but his successor ignored him completely.

"It can't be you, because even if you manage to convince them you're not the Detective L, they'll still connect you to Beyond and send you off to an asylum."

Anger boiled his blood. "If you say one more damn word-"

Near pursed his lips, having reached the conclusion L and Light had come to from the very beginning.

"And it can't be Near." Mello completed firmly. "He was the one seen tampering with BB's crime scenes. If they bring that up, they can put a tracker inside him for the rest of his life. We only have one option."

There was a brief silence, punctuated only by the loudspeaker from outside. _"Come outside immediately! If you don't, we have been given permission to open fire!"_

L curled his hands into fists as Light sat up straight, his Adam's apple moving as he gulped. "I understand."

"What the fuck do you understand? Sit down, Raito-kun, we're going to come up with another plan." L hissed.

Light closed his eyes. "There's no other plan. You know that as well as I do."

"Besides, we don't have time for this." Mello blurted. "Didn't you hear them? They're going to open fire!"

L felt his face heat up. "I don't fucking care, Mello! He is not going to sacrifice himself! I will not let you go, Raito, there's nothing you can do to make me leave you. I will surrender with you."

Near's words were softly spoken. "They will harm you, L. They will not harm Light, he is one of them."

"He's not one of them!" L bellowed. "You are a naïve idiot if you think they will leave him unharmed! Things will become worse than when he escaped in the first place! His father, his _suitor_ , I made him a promise that I would never let them take him again, and I will _honour_ that promise-"

"Lawliet."

A smooth voice, made of silk and velvet, a voice that could become bitter as a pickle, sharp as a thorn-bush and sweet as syrup all in the space of milliseconds. A voice he had never imagined being separated permanently from, a voice that was now fiery as a pepper and hard as a stone wall.

Light's eyes filled his vision, a dark gold that reminded him of cinnamon and honey, somehow triumphant, somewhere in there. "Lawliet. That promise isn't just some sentimental romantic crap, I made you make that promise as insurance against being left behind when you escape. How can you escape if you're captured and executed?"

"Yes, but how can I escape if _you're_ captured, Raito-kun? I'm not stepping a foot off this goddamn island without you-"

"And I'm not asking you to!" Light's tone was wheedling, the echo of a salesman on a porch, but there was a smug quality to it that no salesman should adopt. "I'm not going to stay captured, idiot. Do you have no faith in me? I've escaped once, I can escape again." He winked cheekily, and L could just forget everything that was happening, he could just put his faith in the self-assured teenager and stay where he was.

"No, Raito-kun, I won't let you return to them, I've seen what they've done to you-"

Mello groaned. "L, we don't have the time for this! Come on, Light!" And the blonde had the nerve to grab him by the arm, yanking him up to his feet. "Let's go!"

The rage inside L reached a peak, and he clambered forward. "Don't you dare touch him, Mihael Keehl, you second-rate tool-"

 _"Lawliet."_ Light snapped. He strode forward, grasping the detective by the collar and pulling him up to eye-level from his slouch. With barely a moment of hesitation, the teenager pressed his lips to his, kissing him hard, his cold hands wrapped around L's waist and holding him close.

He pulled away, unsmiling, his eyes serious and sober. "It's my turn to make a promise, L. I promise I will return to you. I _promise_." He grinned crookedly. "Besides, you're not going to sit on your ass, are you? You're going to rescue me, and we're going to elope to England to eat scones and crumpets."

L's lips quirked up for a fraction of a millisecond, before the loudspeaker from outside blared, shattering the moment. _"We're going to count to five before we open fire! I repeat, we have you surrounded! One!"_

"That's my cue." Light shrugged, getting to his feet. To anyone else, he might have looked confident and in control, even bored. "Get ready to go."

"Raito-kun, you shouldn't-" L started, but Light cut him off with a fierce look.

"I'm not going to hear another word from you. You better make this worth it."

Near came up next to L and nodded. "We will, Yagami. Thank you."

Light nodded once, hooding his eyes. When he looked back at L, his face was open, and the detective could see every emotion he was feeling clear as day. Fear, panic, grief, stubbornness. The teenager squeezed his eyes shut, blanking his expression, and gave him a slight smile. "I love you, Lawliet. I'll see you soon."

L tried to get the words out, _he had to say it_ , but before he could the loudspeaker drowned his words out. _"Two!"_

Mello hauled him along towards the south window as Light marched to the doorway. The brunet pushed the double-doors open and put his hands up _. "I surrender!"_ He screamed out into the air, and Mello made his move, vaulting out of the abandoned window just as the forces moved away from it.

The detective complied for a time, until he heard Light's voice pipe up again, this time shriller and more panicked. _"I surrender! I said I surrender!"_

L whipped his head back to catch a glimpse of Light through the reflection of a window, behind the police who were closing in around him. The officer with the loudspeaker, a burly man twice the size of the teenager in front of him, ripped a weapon from his belt, a slim black Taser. Light pleaded again, _I surrender,_ before he shrieked. He clutched his gut, where the policeman had shocked him, and crumpled to his knees.

L shrieked in turn, just managing to keep his mouth shut. _You better make this worth it._

He looked back once more as he ran, and he could just make out the silhouette of the policemen picking up a slender young man in a collared shirt and dragging him into a closed van.

He looked so small, so vulnerable, and obviously still conscious, shivering with pain. _Make this worth it_. They tossed his body inside like a sack of potatoes.

It wasn't worth it.

He remembered the stories he had heard that one night, when they were both a tangled mess of limbs, the moonlight a sliver over their bodies as Light rested his head on L's chest and told him exactly why he could never return home.

"L, get back here!" Near hissed, making a grab for his sweatshirt as he turned on his heel and sped back towards the swarm of policemen, his heart pounding in his ears, _thump, thump, thump._

"L!" He heard the white-haired boy shout as he scurried after him. He had always known Near was the more loyal one. "Don't do it, L!"

His feet slapped against the ground, his vision tunnelled, his breath came out in bursts.

"L!"

The policemen grew closer and closer, the doors of the van slammed shut, the driver started the engine.

 _"L, wake up!"_

Something slammed into his head, smacking his forehead into his keyboard and typing gibberish into the newly awakened screen. L opened his eyes to a warm room, a rough carpet under his knees, his laptop's screen lit up a harsh white, a page of recent criminal trials displayed on it.

The white noise in his head dulled, the silence of the room sinking in.

He raised his head to meet a pair of honey-brown eyes, the teenager's tanned face washed pale, long brown eyelashes glowing silver in the light of the laptop. "L? Are you okay?"

The detective's words stuck in his throat. "I must've…" He swallowed. "I must've fallen asleep. While I was working." He noticed the battered pillow lying at his side. "Did you throw that at me?"

Yagami Raito blushed red, and he almost forgot what his face looked like drawn in fear, what it looked like when they had carted him off... "You were having a bad dream and you woke me. I…got a little mad at you."

He couldn't help it. L found himself grinning. "Well, I apologise for waking you. I don't think I shall be sleeping again, so you don't have to worry." He turned to face his computer once more, deleting the string of nonsense he had typed in his sleep.

"Um. L." Light started hesitantly, and L looked up at him. _He looked so much like him_. "Listen, I don't feel okay about this arrangement. I…I can sleep on the floor-"

"Shut up." L blurted out. The brunet frowned doubtfully.

"I'm sorry?"

L ducked his head, keeping his eyes fixed on the screen. "I don't have the time for your politeness. I know you are not actually offering to sleep on the floor. Just say what you want."

The brunet shrugged dismissively. "Alright. Everything considered, I've been brought up to be considerate, so I don't mind you sleeping in bed with me. As long as you stay on your side."

L bit his fingernail hesitantly. The last thing he wanted after that dream was to be close to this Light, but he couldn't turn him down. This was too much a step in the right direction. "If you say so." He closed his laptop resolutely, plunging the room into darkness as he climbed under the covers, jostling him out of the way to make space.

He felt the mattress tilt as the teenager settled into his side, adjusting the chain of the handcuff so it didn't dig into their skin.

They were silent for a time, but the detective could tell Light was awake by his breathing. Shallow and rough, as if he was prepping himself to say something.

And finally, it did come. "L?"

L blinked awake. "Yes?"

"Are you sure you're okay? You…were making strange noises in your sleep. I think you were crying."

Crying? L swiped his hand over his cheeks, finding them perfectly dry. "I am fine, Raito-kun. Thank you for the concern."

The brunet's voice was halting, careful. "I'm sorry for what I said back in the other room. I…I don't quite understand what's going on, but I'm convinced you don't mean for anything bad to happen to me. I was out of line."

A smile curled the detective's lips. "You don't have to explain. I know what you're like when you're tired and irritable. I forgive you."

"I'm not asking for your forgiveness." Light shot out. "You're still a criminal. Your good intentions don't mean shit. Still, I shouldn't behave any which way just because I'm in bad company."

L turned to his side with a sigh. After a second, he felt Light turn the opposite way.

A final thought struck him as he began to nod off. "Um, goodnight, Raito-kun."

"Goodnight, L." The teenager whispered under his breath, already mostly asleep.

"Not Lawliet?" L gazed at the lump of bedclothes beside him as it seemed to shrug.

"Is that your name?" Light mumbled.

L sighed. _It was worth a shot_. "Yes, but I don't want you to call me that. Not yet, at least. L will do."

"I'll keep that in mind." The brunet snuggled into his sheets as he dropped easily off to sleep.

Light had always been able to do that, fall asleep anywhere and anytime like someone had flicked off a switch. L had always admired that in him, it was a convenient skill to have.

As he waited for dawn to break, L Lawliet closed his eyes and gripped the chain links of the handcuffs in his fist.

.

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A/N: Gimme those reviews and encourage me pls :(


	11. Shower

Light's dreams usually consisted of pretty things.

It was weird as fuck. After all, he was Light Yagami, deep thinker extraordinaire. He was the last person he expected to have long, detailed dreams about silk ribbons and kittens, but for some reason, when he woke up with the smell of pizza and cake still lingering in his nostrils, it wasn't uncharacteristic of him at all.

He moaned, stretching his limbs. It was going to be a terrible day. His body ached, his head felt vaguely fuzzy, all he wanted to do was go back to sleep, but there was somebody shaking him awake impatiently, fucking Mikami wanted to go on a walk before his shift or something (one of these days, Light was going to sleep inside his closet, anything to keep his idiot fiancé from waking him early).

Light shoved the person hovering over him away. "I swear to God, if you don't get out of my face-"

His wrist shot with pain as the handcuff pressed against the raw skin underneath, the chain clinking on metal.

 _Holy fuck. It hadn't been a dream._

"I apologise for the inconvenience, Yagami-kun. L requested your presence immediately." A formal, English-accented voice enunciated, and the teenager opened his eyes in slits.

Sunlight managed to squeeze its way through the shuttered and boarded windows, highlighting the squatness of the furniture, the shabby nature of everything around him.

He propped himself up on his elbows, raising his wrist to eye-level. The chain of the handcuff was longer than he had thought, looping once around the bed and ending at the headboard, where an elderly gentleman was unlocking it to hold in his hand.

The gentleman smiled congenially. "L has an erratic sleep schedule. He had chained you to the bedpost for a majority of the night. I hope you had a good sleep. If you will follow me, I'll show you to the bathroom."

Light ran his hand over his face, waking himself up. He needed himself alert, especially with the old man holding the handcuff like it was the end of an actual leash, but it was so easy to just cave to their good manners and the instinct telling him everything was alright. _I thought you were better than this, Yagami Raito._

He swung his legs off of the bed, getting to his feet and giving the gentleman a reluctant nod. "I'd like that, thank you."

"You need not thank me, Yagami Raito." The Englishman began to walk, leading him out of the room into the corridor that bordered the edge of the main room where he could see the redheaded Matt, the kid who seemed to think of him as one of his best friends. He cleared his throat. "I am indebted to you. We all are. You saved our lives with your sacrifice, after all."

Light chewed on his lip, his nails niggling at the skin of his palm. "Sacrifice?"

The old man nodded understandingly. "Ah, right. You turned yourself in to the authorities to save my sons. I'm told that's how your fiancé found you. It was a great sacrifice, Yagami-kun, and don't think we forget things like that." He bowed respectfully as he walked. "You may refer to me as Watari, by the way."

Turned himself in to the _authorities?_ Ah, of course, he was supposed to have been a fugitive for some reason. He had to figure out how to use this information, but it was so consistently bizarre that he had no clue what to do with it.

"Here we are." Watari stopped, opening the door leading into a bare-bones restroom lit with a single yellow bulb, the head of a shower at the far left corner. "L prepared it for you beforehand. He left some clothes on the rack there."

Light finally felt the prick of hope blossoming in his chest. He could use this, he could hunt this room for an advantage of any kind, he could have an edge on them. All he needed was a blade to stick inside his shirtsleeve or some soap he could use to slide his hand out of his cuff, and then he could find BB, threaten him with his neurostimulation chip and get home free.

He stepped into the bathroom with a wide smile that dimmed slightly when his escort followed him inside.

Light let out a nervous laugh, twisting the cuff around his wrist. "Watari-san, I thought I was to take a bath."

"Yes, you are." The old man said complacently.

Light fidgeted. "Um, are you going to…stay inside?"

"I understand your distress, Yagami-kun. Unfortunately, L deems it necessary that you are to be watched at all times, and with your allegations against him last night, he thinks it is better if I observe you rather than him."

 _Observe?_ "I-I don't think I'm comfortable with this-"

Watari broke into a gentle smile, pointing at the shower head. "There are curtains, you see? I won't breach your privacy. I only need to make sure you don't have anything on your person or meddle with anything in such a way that our identity or mission is compromised."

Light hugged his elbows, thinking. Common sense was telling him to just not budge, refuse the bath and stay in stinking clothes for the sake of his dignity. However, _however_ , Watari had just said he wasn't going to watch him in the shower (oh, the thought of that). All he needed to do was find something in _there_ to use.

The brunet nodded jerkily, loping over to the shower and pulling the curtains shut, glancing at his surroundings and doing a double take. Nothing, not even soap.

As if able to read his mind, Watari spoke. "It's all outside, Yagami-kun. I shall place them near the edge of the curtain and you may pick them up."

 _Damn it._ Light almost gave up on the whole exercise, except he could smell himself. Let nobody think Yagami Raito was okay with smelling like three-day-old takeout food (what had that bed held before him?).

"You may place your clothes on the floor and slide them outside." Watari suggested, and Light suppressed a groan.

Oh well. He sighed heavily as he unbuttoned his shirt, readying himself for the most awkward experience of his life.

…

The halls were too wide for one person, even with the wheelchair.

Mikami had bought this manor with a family in mind. Neither he nor Raito had expected to be selected for the sectioning, so both of them (presumably) had had having children as one of their goals in life. Not that Mikami regretted this for an instant, he would have traded any number of families for his life with Raito, but it was a thought. He had always thought that the righteous should convert as many as possible from the paths of the criminals, and one way to do that was to pick up children in poverty and raise them under their roof.

For some reason, things with Raito just weren't going as fast as he had wanted it to in the beginning. It had been more than a year since they had initially gotten engaged, and they were still unmarried. Yes, most of that was because of Light's expedition into the wild, and perhaps a little bit of Mikami's admittedly harsh treatment of his mate in the beginning.

He remembered the engagement party, how the brunet had been disdainful and icy throughout the proceedings. Yes, maybe Mikami was no one to speak, being drunk and tipsy all evening, but Raito had been flat-out rude.

He'd run away from home three days later.

After that, Mikami had been separated from Light for half a year, constantly hunting for any sign of him with his father. Later, during his confession, they'd discovered that he had been working as a kind of freelance detective to support himself, doing charity work for the poor and associating with anarchists in his free time. But while he was doing all that, for six months Mikami had thought him dead.

He regretted everything. He regretted the drunken nights, the punishments, listening to Yagami Soichiro tell him how to discipline his son. He regretted every moment he had spent hurting him.

Maybe it was understandable for a nineteen year old to balk at the prospect of marrying a man who followed Yagami Soichiro's methods. He probably hadn't adjusted to it, even if he had grown up under its influence. Perhaps he had expected to escape his abusive household through his marriage, and Mikami had dashed his hopes to the ground.

Mikami knew he had been wrong, and he made every effort to make up for his mistakes. The undertaking had been a second chance for him, a chance to use everything he had learnt to actually court the only person he could stand in this wretched world.

And it hadn't been enough. They had never gotten to even fix a date for the marriage because of Light's extended recovery period, let alone discuss starting a family. Maybe Mikami was destined to spend his life wondering if Yagami Raito was alive because if he wasn't running away on his own, he was being stolen away by terrorists.

Who they were Mikami didn't know, but he knew that just because they had managed to wipe his anarchist run from the brunet's mind didn't mean his ties to that world had disappeared with it. They should have thought about it before, they should've taken measures to ensure his safety. Who knew what kind of goons Raito had pissed off? He was a strong personality, after all.

Seven months ago, they had managed to wipe the slate clean. Now, the minute he found his Raito alive and well, he would wash the slate down, he would make it so nothing from that world could ever hurt his family again.

The doctor's polished shoes gleamed from the footrest of his wheelchair as he hummed along down the corridor. He had refused a caretaker. He was Dr. Mikami Teru, he performed surgeries on the worst criminals in Shingata, he didn't need a nurse to take care of him for bloody gunshot wounds.

Besides, he was going to be fine. The bullets had lodged themselves into bone rather than muscle, it was easy to fix. In fact, the doctor had assured him that he would even be able to start operating again in a month. Only the best treatment for the great Dr. Mikami Teru.

He rolled his way towards his study, his finger firm on the button that kept him moving at an even pace, when he noticed something off about his surroundings.

A couple feet ahead was Raito's room, and its door was ajar.

Sweat broke out over Mikami's brow. He considered calling security but ultimately decided against it. If there was yet another anarchist inside his home, he would deal with it himself. He would show them exactly what five years of med school taught him about human anatomy.

He pressed the button, the chair sweeping along until he had reached the cracked-open door, feeling a sense of déjà vu as he shoved it open. It had looked exactly this way last night…

There was a flurry of movement inside as the intruder ducked into a hiding spot, and Mikami felt the blood boil. "Who the fuck are you? I can see you there! How dare you enter my fiancé's room?" He said in his most authoritative voice.

He heard a squeak come from inside the closet.

It sounded distinctly of Raito. Not that that said much, almost everything reminded him of Raito ever since he got back from the hospital, but he had heard the boy make that exact same sound once, when he had spilt soup over Mikami's hand while serving it.

The doctor directed his wheelchair into the room, making sure not to scratch the bed. "Sayu-chan. Get out here before I call your father."

There was a begrudging huff, and the closet door creaked open. A lanky girl with long brown hair stepped out, her arms crossed over her chest obstinately. Her lips were stuck in a pout. "What do you want?"

"What do _I_ want?" Mikami was incredulous. "What were you doing sneaking through my fiancé's belongings?"

"He's not your fiancé, he's my brother." She scowled, turning a strange pebble-like object round and round in her hands. Mikami made a grab for it, but Sayu hopped neatly out of the way. "And don't be stupid, Mikami-san. The police have already looked in here, they're not going to bother looking again."

 _"Excuse_ me? Who do you think you're calling stupid? I'm going to call your father this instant, you insolent whelp-"

Sayu's chocolate brown eyes narrowed, and there was a tinge of pink across her cheeks. She pulled her coat tighter around herself, slipping the object into her pocket. Her upturned nose rose in the air, a shadow of her brother's haughty expression. "You're such a fucking coward."

That caught Mikami off-guard. "W-what? What the hell-?" He spluttered, shocked at her language. The brunette glared at him.

"You're a coward. I told my father this the first time you came to court Raito last year, I knew it from the very beginning. Unfortunately, my opinion didn't count for much, and neither did Raito's. We all know why my father had Raito marry you, it's not because you're a good man. You're a shitty mate and a shitty human being."

Mikami's ears burned. "Who the fuck do you think you are, to talk like this about me inside my house?"

Her laughter was tinkling, like water in a basin. "What are you going to do, Mikami-san? Tell on a sixteen year old girl to her father? Am I being too rude?"

Her amused expression dropped abruptly, her eyes glinting. "You selfish bastard. You'll care about my brother as long as it suits you, as long as he's the pretty little chocolate boy on your arm. But he's not a decoration, Mikami-san. Damn it, _I'm_ more of a decoration than he is. If everything had gone according to plan, if my father had sectioned me instead of him like he was supposed to, I would have been able to deal with this life. I would have been able to deal with _you_. I don't know what all you've done to my brother to make him submit, Mikami Teru, but I'm going to make sure you pay for it."

The doctor's mouth had fallen open. "What _I've_ done to him?" _She didn't know about the undertaking. The only people who knew were himself and Soichiro, nobody else. He had even done the operation himself, there was no way she knew…_ "What the hell have I done to him? He's been kidnapped by anarchists!"

"And look what you're doing about it." Sayu spat, striding past his wheelchair out of his room, her hand pressed into her pocket, keeping whatever object she had stolen out of Raito's room in place. "I'm going to find my brother, and when I bring him back, I'm going to force my father to see sense about you. My brother's mistakes aren't big enough to warrant lifelong punishment."

"Hey!" Mikami growled. He attempted to turn his wheelchair in its place to follow her but hit the side of the cupboard hard, the frame of the chair shuddering. "Get back here, you brat! What's that in your pocket?"

The girl didn't answer, walking briskly away. He fiddled exasperatedly with the button until he managed to get his chariot under control, zooming his way out of the room to catch up with her. "Sayu, I'm going to tell your father all about this! You're going to regret every word you said-"

Sayu's phone buzzed loudly, belting out the bars to a famous pop song by hit noble idol Ryuga Hideki, and the girl whipped it out, tilting slightly to the side and cupping her mouth as if that was an effective shield against Mikami's eavesdropping. _The nerve of the girl, she was as bad as Raito._

"Hello?" The girl started, then frowned, looking straight ahead.

A pause. "I didn't order any pizza…"

Mikami frowned as she cocked her head to the side. "Yes, this is Yagami Sayu. Yes, I'm the daughter of Yagami Soichiro."

She waited a few moments and snorted. "No, I'm not his sister-in-law. My brother's not married, and he's not likely to be if I have any say in it. Why are you asking me this anyway? I told you I didn't order anything." A few more seconds, and she raised her eyebrows incredulously. "Are you serious? He ordered it with my father's money?" And then, the brunette turned to give Mikami a piercingly contemptuous look.

She pressed mute on the screen of her cellphone. "You serious, Mikami? My brother was kidnapped last night. He's probably starving and frightened out of his mind, and you order pizza? I can't believe you."

The doctor blinked blankly. "What are you talking about?"

The girl rolled her eyes, going back to her call. "Cancel it, thank you. If he wants to waste money, the asshole can waste his own."

Mikami was baffled. "I haven't ordered anything, I'm on meds. I can barely taste regular food."

Sayu ignored him, absorbed in the call. "What?" She sounded confused. "How do you know about that? It's only been some twenty-four hours. He only just got out of the hospital." She drummed her fingers on her elbow. "Oh, gossip magazines! Tell them he's absolutely fine, though between you and me, I wish the anarchist had aimed just a little lower. A hole through the heart would have kept him out of my father's credit card for sure."

Her laughter rang out loudly. "Yeah, keep that a secret. Thank you, Ryuuzaki-san. I'm sorry about the cancelled order. Bye!"

Sayu snapped her phone shut and faced Mikami's severe glare.

"What?"

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A/N: Gimme those reviews! :)


	12. Watari

Watari was reasonably sure that the presence of Yagami Raito in the house was driving his ward insane.

He had known from the very beginning that L was an unbalanced child, strange and eccentric. The Englishman had taught him to put on an emotionless mask to make up for his abysmal social skills, but it used so much of his energy that when he took it off his emotions went absolutely haywire.

Of course, he wasn't comparing him to Beyond or Mello. In the Whammy household, haywire was very relative.

"Your wrist, please." The former inventor reached out and took Yagami's hand, clicking his handcuff back on.

The handcuffs was another example of L's obliviousness. Watari was sure he didn't grasp the seriousness of his actions in a social context. The fact that Light was complying without complaint was incredible, he was sure this Shingatese teenager was the only one perceptive enough to understand L's strangeness on some level.

Either that, or he was frightened out of his mind, but something told Watari that this boy didn't scare easily.

Yagami Raito fidgeted with the long sleeves of the maroon shirt he wore over baggy jeans, evidently bothered by the roughness of the material. The quality must have been a far cry from his usual clothing, these had belonged to one of the orphans from Roger's orphanage.

"This way, Yagami-kun." Watari placed a gentle hand on the small of the teenager's back, and the boy flinched, trotting a few steps forward with his head bowed. The old man sighed. As expected, he hadn't taken so well to the monitored shower.

Watari couldn't empathise. Living at Whammy's House for the past twenty years had hardened him against sensibilities such as privacy. It wasn't easy managing a house full of eccentric geniuses.

The inventor rubbed his thumb over the hinge of the cuff he held in his hand. L had gotten these long handcuffs from Roger himself, a legacy of his and Watari's kinky youth. Back then, it had gone unsaid that L was really keeping it so that Mello wouldn't get his hands on it, forget actually using it himself. After Raito had entered his life, though…

"Watari-san?" The boy walking in front of him whispered in a gravelly voice, breaking him out of his thoughts. The Englishman immediately snapped alert.

"What is it, Yagami-kun?"

The teenager hugged his elbows, his chin tilted down towards his chest. "Watari-san, what is L going to do with me?" His tone was vulnerable, innocent, childlike, obviously appealing to Watari's sensitivities to orphans.

Quillish Whammy, Watari, the guardian of the future world's greatest detective and his successors, knew an act when he saw one.

"What do you think L is going to do with you, Yagami-kun?" Watari said, a twinkle in his eye. Light didn't seem to notice the sarcasm, folding tighter into himself.

"I-I don't know. He doesn't seem to want to hurt me, but…but if he isn't going to hurt me, why doesn't he just let me go? All I am is a burden on him, and on you, evidently."

The old man smiled. "I'm sure everybody's told you everything you need to know at this point. What exactly do you want from me?"

"I…" The brunet fixed him with those wide, appealing amber eyes. "I was just hoping…maybe you could help me? Maybe we can help each other? If I'm gone, you don't have to waste so many resources keeping me restrained, and I can guarantee you I won't talk, because-"

"Yagami Raito." The Englishman interjected. "I don't make a point of betraying my sons. And if you try to escape, know this. I am a black-belt in karate and have been trained in the art of sharpshooting by Olympic-level professionals."

That stunned him. His eyes swept over the elderly gentleman's unassuming form.

Watari chuckled. "I need not be young to have skills, dear boy, and my son has told me enough about you to ensure you have no physical training apart from a brief stint at middle-school tennis."

Light's mouth dropped open, terribly offended, but before he could say anything, they reached the landing and the old man stopped in his tracks.

"What on Earth is going on?" Watari asked faintly.

 _"Pack it up! Matt, get your ass on the move! Pack up the computer!"_ Mello was screaming at the top of his lungs. Beside him, Misa was mimicking his posture mockingly, cupping her hands around her mouth.

 _"L-san! On your feet! Do some work, this is your fault anyway!"_ Misa screeched merrily. _"Beyond-san! Come on out, you've got to do your part too!"_

Watari strode forward, yanking Light along by the handcuff, looking for the sanest member of the household as of that moment. Currently, Mello looked delirious with fury, Misa was being her usual airhead self, Beyond was still locked up in the office and L was sitting in his crouch on the floor, giving everyone a flat, absent look.

Matt it was, then.

"Matt!" Watari boomed, and the redhead dropped the computer he was shifting. Mello shrieked, loping over and smacking the third-ranked successor over the head. Matt grimaced, rubbing it resentfully as he turned to face his mentor.

"What do you want?" He asked, pulling on the strap of his orange-tinted goggles.

The old man pursed his lips. "Why are you packing, Matt?"

"Ugh." Mail Jeevas groaned. "Don't ask. L messed up." He sighed, going to assist Mello with the rest of the stuff they were hauling towards the still-locked door.

On hearing his name, L blinked sluggishly. His large dark eyes snapped to his guardian, and then to Raito, who was standing behind him, acting like he was frightened by the proceedings. A large smile stretched the detective's lips, likely without his knowledge.

"Hello there, Raito-kun." He sprung to his feet. "You look...fresh." Watari almost sighed with relief. At least L hadn't been blatantly honest about his views on how attractive their hostage looked.

Light rolled his eyes, and Watari noticed the tension lift from his shoulders, as if talking to L was easier than dealing with the rest of his situation. "Yeah, no shit. You made me take a shower."

 _"Made_ you? I suppose Raito-kun didn't notice the smell of week-old Kung Pao lingering around him."

The teenager snorted with laughter, much to Watari's incredulity. "Maybe I'd be more grateful if you didn't have your father watching me the whole time."

"Guardian." L corrected, walking closer and reaching for the cuff in Watari's hand without breaking eye-contact with the brunet. "And I was of the opinion that there's a curtain in that bathroom."

Light raised his eyebrows. "Why do you say that like it makes it okay? Is this how the peasants bathe?"

 _"Peasants?_ Is that what the nobles call the masses these days?" L's fingers scrabbled unseeingly over Watari's hand as the old man gripped the cuff tightly in his fist. The detective gave him a baffled look.

"Give me the cuff, Watari."

Watari narrowed his eyes. "L."

"What?"

And with that, he exploded. "L, _what_ _is going on? Why are you packing? How did you mess up? What is this nonsense?"_ It had been years since he had raised his voice over a polite command. His throat wasn't quite used to it anymore.

The entire room fell dead silent. Mello, Matt and Misa stared blankly at them as L reeled back.

"Watari…" Mello breathed, startled. "Jesus, you'll have a heart attack."

The founder of Whammy's House gritted his teeth together. "L, answer me this instant or I will…" He thought for a second. "I will have _Misa_ take over supervision of Yagami-kun."

Misa squealed. "Does that mean Misa gets to be _handcuffed_ to him?" She bounced over to them, yipping. "Mello told Misa all about your problem, Raito-kun! Misa will be careful! Misa will be nicer than _L_ -san-"

L elbowed her out of the way. "Look, Watari, it's not really an issue-"

 _"Not an issue?"_ Mello growled from his spot by the boxes. "We have to leave this headquarters because of you!"

The detective shrugged. "We had to leave it soon anyway. It's been two weeks."

"Yeah, but _still!"_

L shook out his thick black hair. "I may have forgotten the third layer of the satellite scrambler when I made a call. But in my defence, nobody's going to check."

Matt snickered as he repacked the computer and began to heft it out. "Nobody's going to check? Just ask him who he called."

Watari covered his eyes with his hand. "Who did you call?"

L mumbled something under his breath.

 _"L."_ Watari barked, and his ward crossed his arms.

"Sayu Yagami." He muttered.

Light blinked."What?"

Misa hopped about happily, splaying her hands out. "L-san made a mistake! Misa gets to be handcuffed to her Raito!"

"Why on Earth were you calling the daughter of Soichiro Yagami, L?"

The spindly man shrugged. "The investigation is at a halt until we break through their security, there is a 20% chance that Soichiro Yagami's favoured child is given access to files for her grooming into the noble database, so we can use a sample of her voice. Besides…" He scuffed his foot against the floor, his cheeks pink. "I probed her for information about Mikami." He glanced at Light bashfully. "To answer your doubts about his well-being, Raito-kun, he's fine and doing well, the bullets barely fazed him."

The brunet broke into a wide grin. "L, wow, thank you-"

"L's compromiiiiiised." Matt sang as he piled up a final box of their equipment in front of the front door. "You should be calling Roger, Watari, we'll need to squat at the orphanage for a bit before Mello gets us a new place to stay from his mafia pals."

Watari sighed, resigned. "Yes, I suppose I'll do that. Give me five minutes, I'll arrange everything." He began to walk back to his room to fetch his phone and few belongings, halting when he remembered the handcuff still in his hands.

L reached out expectantly. "I'll take that, Watari. You may go about your business."

"Oh, no, no." The Englishman held it out of his grasp. "No, L. You know the Whammy House motto."

"How could we ever forget? You remind us every day."

"And it seems you require reminding." Watari puffed up haughtily and Mello and Matt burst into laughter. _"The one who wins in the end is the winner._ It's a perfectly good slogan."

"I fail to see the relevance of this, Watari. Give me the handcuff-" L pleaded.

There was a creak from the landing, and BB banged the office door open, rubbing his temple wearily, eyes bloodshot and face pale. Surveying the room, the murderer grunted. "Great, Professor X is still here. I'll stay in the office until we need to leave. Don't forget to wake me." The serial killer turned on his heel and slammed the door shut on them again.

Watari, in the meantime, had pried the cuff from L's hands and held it primly in the air.

"The winner of this scenario, is neither me nor you, my son. It is Amane Misa. Misa-chan, I know you will be vigilant."

The blonde woman squawked with pleasure when the gentleman clicked the cuff locked around her tiny wrist. "Oh my god, Misa can't believe this. _Misa gets to be handcuffed to her Raito!"_

"Perhaps this will teach you something about responsibility." Watari remarked as L fumed.

"And in the meantime, I suppose we should make preparations to transport our guest on our cross-country drive."

.

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A/N: Gimme those reviews! :)


	13. Cheesecake

"Ooh, Raito-kun is hungry!"

Misa could not remember a time when she had not been madly in love with Yagami Raito. Sure, it had been only half a year that they had been near each other, and sure, he had been in a passionate relationship with L the whole time, but that didn't change anything. In her heart, Misa knew she and Raito were soulmates, if not romantically then spiritually. And if she couldn't be with him in this life, she would join him in the long walk of death (what? She loved him!).

They were meant to be, and nothing could change her mind.

The model giggled, poking Raito where she knew he was ticklish and savouring in his embarrassed squeak. They had cuffed his hands behind his back and his ankles together so he couldn't run, because according to Mello, he wanted to now. Apparently, Mikami had brainwashed him into becoming a typical noble (she had met enough of those in her modelling career, ugh) who didn't remember anything about the Whammy kids, their escape plan or L.

The first thought that had popped into Misa's head when Mello told her that had been _now's my chance_. She had to admit that, because she was learning the art of meditation from Watari and one part of the learning process had been cleansing her mind of hateful thoughts. Taking L's lover away from him when he obviously still loved him was one heck of a hateful thought. Misa-Misa had more honour than that!

But that didn't stop her from playing with him. Nobody could stop her from messing with Raito-kun, not even Raito-kun himself.

The teenager in question was giving her a resentful look from under his bangs. Misa grinned smugly. "Does Raito-kun want Misa to stop ticking him when he is tied up?"

Slowly, the brunet shut his eyes. "I'd really appreciate it, thanks." He gritted out, looking fixedly away.

Misa smothered her giggles. "Well, Raito-kun thanked Misa too soon, because Misa's not going to stop!" Determinedly, the girl stabbed her fingers into his side, snickering when he yelped.

"What on Earth was that?" He snapped, his face pink as the ribbons on her dress. "That can't even be classified as tickling. God, at least do it right."

Oh, he was exactly like she remembered him. "Sorry Misa isn't an expert! She's never had anyone to try it on before except Raito-kun!" She protested. "Mello only shoves her away and threatens to shoot her!"

From the corner of the van, beside where BB was dozing off, the blond ex-gangster tossed his head, polishing the handle of his pistol as Matt held his chocolate for him. "I will, you know. You're dispensable."

"Misa isn't dispensable! Mello loves Misa. Everyone loves Misa!" Misa declared, throwing her hands out. Her gaze landed on the snoring BB, and her expression soured slightly. "Okay, maybe except Stalker-san."

Light frowned, his weight shifting as he tried to get comfortable with his bonds. "Beyond stalked you? How did you get him to not kill you?"

Misa rolled her eyes. "Raito-kun already knows Misa's story."

She braced herself for his reaction. Anytime she hadn't answered one of his questions directly, he always, _always_ did something like, say, kiss L in front of her or grab the detective's ass. Something to drive in the point that she was never supposed to waste his time. She had gotten the impression that old Light, deep inside his heart, didn't like her very much.

New Light, though, when he heard her deflect his question, got a crooked little smile on his lips that had her heart beating a thousand miles a minute. He simpered charmingly. "You caught me, Amane-san." His voice was sickly sweet, so sarcastic it made her pucker. "I obviously know your story. That's why I asked."

Matt snorted with laughter, but Misa gasped, her cheeks flooding with heat. He was bantering with her, he was making a joke with her!

"W-well, if Raito-kun wants to hear it again, Misa doesn't mind telling it!" She fumbled with her words, flustered. "Misa was a non-noble model who was kicked out because she is very, very anarchist. The nobles didn't punish the murderer of her parents, so Misa thought she should obviously go to the anarchist ways if she wanted to get revenge. She tried blowing up the building where the murderer lived, but some evil people, including Stalker-san, had stalked her because she had blown up their hideout as practice. She was about to die when Mello saved her life and took her home."

Light raised his eyebrows. "You're a legitimate anarchist, then? The violent kind?"

"Yeah." Misa sighed. "Raito-kun has never liked that about Misa, but Misa can't help it. It's in the past, though. After Raito-kun got her parents' murderer captured and killed by a gang through his anonymous detective tips as Kira, Misa never tried to plant another bomb."

The brunet frowned, pensive. "So I didn't just create a pseudonym to solve crimes, I also got them judged by the peasant mafia instead of the authorities?"

"Of course! And for that, Misa is eternally grateful to Raito-kun!" She tossed her head perkily, striking a pose, and to her absolute delight, Light laughed. She squealed, clapping her hands together.

"Misa made Raito-kun laugh! Raito-kun never used to laugh before!"

From the corner, Mello's redheaded boyfriend slipped his orange goggles off his eyes. "Of course he laughed, Misa. He just didn't laugh with you." He sounded almost offended, as if Misa had insulted a close friend.

Misa didn't understand why everyone seemed so stuck on trying to bring back the old Light. Last night, she had overheard a long conversation between Matt and Mello about it, before Watari threw away his cake. She understood that it was inconvenient transporting this Light since, obviously, he wanted to escape and return to the creepy pervert Mikami, but…but he seemed so much happier than before. On a general basis, at least. He was brighter, as if someone had replaced the old flickering lightbulb in him with three new ones. Younger, fresher, as if he didn't see the world as a totally rotten place anymore.

She was just about to say something of that kind when she heard an odd rumbling and burst into laughter. "Oh, Raito-kun is hungry! Misa totally forgot!"

Light turned beet-red, drawing his knees up to his chin as if to disguise the growling of his stomach.

"It's okay, Raito-kun! Misa knows for a fact that L-san will always have a candy bar with him! She'll just go get one!" She hopped up, starting to flounce towards the detective when the handcuff jingled and pulled Raito forward.

The teenager groaned, adjusting his hands behind his back so the cuffs didn't dig into his wrists. "Do you really have to keep me handcuffed to you? I can't move anyway."

Misa tapped her chin thoughtfully, glancing at Mello. "Do I?"

Matt crossed his arms. "She really doesn't. This whole thing is stupid. Light isn't going to sabotage anything."

Mello licked his lips, sticking a round of bullets into his revolver. Watari had put him in charge, since he knew Matt wasn't aggressive enough to get everyone to listen. It was a position he really wasn't used to. Not that anyone was used to L not being in control. "Eh, it's okay, I guess. I have a loaded gun. Here." He tossed the keys to Misa, who grinned as she unlocked the cuff and handed them back.

"Thank you, Mello!" She blew him a kiss and skipped off to the back of the van near the doors where L was moping. Underneath the bravado and swagger, Mello was a big old sweetheart. Misa loved him best of the Whammy kids. Though that was understandable, considering he was the one who had saved her life.

Hmm. Why was everyone who rescued her gay?

It was a fleeting thought, but it wriggled into her conscious mind like a rabid worm. When was she going to find her epic romance if everyone who she fell in love with ended up being homosexual? It was becoming a bit of a pattern. Not that she regretted falling in love with Raito, she would never do that, but it would be nice to get someone who would appreciate Misa the way she wanted to be.

Oh well. She threw the thoughts away. She was Amane Misa, she wouldn't stay single for long. It was physically impossible.

She came to a couple boxes holding their technological luggage, behind which L had holed up to mope for the rest of the ride to the orphanage because of what Watari had said before they left. Misa felt herself salivate as she watched him cut a new slice of his blueberry cheesecake and stick it into his mouth, but shook her head, dispelling the thought. She couldn't consider eating cake, it would bloat her up like a balloon.

She was about to beckon him and ask for a piece for Raito when she noticed that he wasn't working on his laptop to find Near like everyone else thought he was. He was…writing. With a ballpoint pen. In a dull blue, weathered down diary with a lock on the cover.

She didn't even know L _could_ write. She had never seen him do it. All day everyday it was just typing and typing on his laptop, click-click-click. Quickly, she ducked behind the boxes and peeked into the page he was scribbling on.

She squinted, reading the words on the top of the page. It was…a list. _Differences_.

The first entry, _Eyes:_ _wider-set, flit around, less wary and suspicious._

 _Humour: Less biting, less aggressive, more good-natured._

 _Response to close contact: Does not flinch, does not respond badly to contact unless consciously determined to be ill-intentioned._

 _Disposition: Less obviously arrogant. Still charming and manipulative. Contains resentment for family but not enough to cause a complex._

 _Martyr Complex: Untested._

 _Moral code: Has the same utilitarian point of view, but supports the nobles this time._

 _Superiority complex: Unchanged._

 _Intelligence: Unchanged._

 _Responses to Stress: Unchanged. However, capable of stopping destructive behaviour such as scratching his palm with his nails when pointed out._

 _Overall Conclusion: Naïve innocence and lack of memory of previous traumas indicates retrograde amnesia. Possible culprits may be torture (25%), hypnotism (15%), neurodegenerative disease (5%), surgery (50%) or other (5%). Lack of family history and age keeps disease at a low probability while fiancé's profession increases likelihood of surgery. However, reason for subject's lack of suspicion about the surgery and apparent explanation for the same to be investigated._

 _Hello, Amane Misa._

Misa squawked, her hands over her mouth as L gave her a dry look, crossing out the last line and shutting the notebook firmly. "Do you make a habit of spying on people, Amane-san?"

"Um…" She gave him a sheepish grin. "Raito-kun wanted cake!"

L raised his eyebrows disbelievingly. "He wants _cake?"_ He glanced over at Light, who had settled into a squat with his back against the wall, grimacing at his lap.

There was a long pause, and Misa was half-sure L was just going to ignore the whole thing and whip out his laptop for good measure when he suddenly pushed his plate of nibbled blueberry cheesecake towards her.

The model blinked. "But you've eaten from that."

"It's the last of the sweets. We didn't pack much when we left."

"Aw, but then you won't have anything, L-san!" Misa protested, but the pale man only gave her a flat look before flipping open his notebook again.

Misa shrugged, picking up the plate. If it didn't matter to L, it didn't matter to her. She held it carefully in her hands like a waitress, trying not to slip and fall with every bump the van went over.

When she finally reached her Raito-kun and glanced back over her shoulder, L was scribbling furiously into his notebook and Misa hid a smile.

…

The van was a lot smaller than he remembered.

He'd seen countless examples of this in his father's cases as a kid. A woman swore from the depths of her heart that the knife her husband had brandished was the size of her forearm; the man who had been cornered by a peasant in an alley had seen a ratty monster; anarchists in crowded places transform from unassuming citizens to tattooed, muscular beasts.

But then again, perhaps the reason the van looked so much tinier now was the number of people in it. Mello and Matt, sitting in the corner fawning over his various illegal weapons, with BB taking yet another nap nearby, trying his hardest to ignore him through unconsciousness, as if Light couldn't wake him in an instant.

L, who was hiding in the corner, probably looking for that successor of his who had been captured by Mikami, and, of course, Misa. Misa, who had forgotten L's purpose for the handcuffs and fallen into his trap.

For once in this whole ordeal, there weren't a pair of eyes scrutinising his every move. This wasn't going to happen again, it was his only chance. Light put his master plan into action.

So far, apart from BB's chip, which was part of his end game, Light had a single other card in his deck: his constant sympathiser, Mail Jeevas. The redhead had a soft spot for him, a guardian angel who had been one of his best friends in his apparent previous life.

But what really interested Light wasn't any of that. It was the mobile phone sticking out of the pockets of his baggy jeans.

It was tiny, easily concealed and disposable, a device that contained neither contacts nor any chance of being tracked. The pocket was too oddly shaped for it, so it stuck out at a strange angle. Light knew if he could only touch it with his fingers, he could have it fall out onto the ground and into his embrace.

The brunet shut his eyes, fishing for a story. It didn't take long, if there was anything Light had in plenty, it was excuses.

"Hey, uh, Matt?"

Matt blinked, startled, looking up from the pistol on his leather-clad friend's lap and giving Light a tentative smile. "What's up?"

Light cleared his throat shyly, keeping his amber eyes on his lap. "Um…" He tested the length of his bindings behind his back. "Do you mind loosening my handcuffs? They're really digging into my skin."

Matt got a rueful look on his face, but just before he stood up Mello's icy blue gaze snapped to Light.

The expression on his face was almost frightening in its intensity, and Light had only just made a mental note to avoid acting suspiciously around this guy when the blonde's eyes softened with what looked like guilt. "I tried to make them as loose as possible." Mello said softly, blue eyes sweeping over him.

What was this development? Why was he giving him that apologetic look? Was he another potential pawn?

Light licked his bottom lip, his line of sight dipping back to his lap. "Oh. I guess it can't be helped, then."

"No, no, Light. It's fine. I'll loosen it." Mello said hastily, scrambling up, and Light's eyes widened in alarm. _No, Mello wasn't supposed to come help him. Matt was the one with the phone!_

Some of his panic must've shown on his face because the blonde stopped in his place, his hand frozen in the pocket of his leather vest. "Light? What happened?" Slowly, he furrowed his brow. "Are you…afraid of me?"

 _Brilliant!_ Light ducked his head nervously, playing the sentiment for all it was worth, giving Matt a fleeting glance. The redhead picked up on it and shuffled over, the phone pretty much dangling out of his pocket.

"Light, he's not going to hurt you. He's my friend. Remember Mello from the stories I told you?" Matt crooned, shifting closer until his hip touched his, the phone within the grasp of his fingers. He had to be quick, he had to slip it out as nimbly as he could. Luckily, Light was more than adept at pickpocketing, he had used it several times to frame Sayu as a kid.

"I know." Light whispered, eyes wide and childlike. "It's just…" His gaze flitted from Matt to Mello and back. "He's carrying a gun."

The two of them shared a sceptical look. Light quickly elaborated. "Nobody uses guns but policemen and killers."

Surprisingly, Mello chuckled. "Holy shit. That's is fucking adorable. Is this why you never used to use them?"

Light felt a prick in his pride. _Adorable?_ It was an entirely legitimate excuse, it _was_ illegal to use guns in Shingata! "Some of us are good honest citizens who don't like armed men approaching them under any circumstance."

Now Matt was chuckling too. "Alright, chill, I'll take his gun, alright?"

 _No!_ "I-I'd really rather not see it…" He racked his brain for more. Fuck this, why didn't Matt just do what he wanted him to?

"I won't show it to you, I promise." The redhead took the shiny black weapon from his blonde friend and made a show of holding it behind his back.

This was more than stupid, it was insulting. They were treating him like a five year old. Light glowered at him, ignoring how hot his face was getting.

Matt chortled. "I'm not patronising you, I swear. I seriously won't show it to you." Instinctively, he reached out to pat the brunet's shoulder with the hand that held the gun and grimaced.

"Oh, fuck." He said, drawing it back and sticking it casually into his pocket.

The gun jostled the phone that was already half-out, and the device tumbled out of his jeans, falling right next to Light's hip.

 _Holy fuck._

The gods were looking out for him. The gods were fucking blessing him with every bit of good karma he had accumulated over the years. Matt hadn't even noticed!

Light had to actively concentrate on not breaking out into a victorious smirk. He wasn't done yet. He still had the hardest part to go, retrieving it. After all, he was still handcuffed.

"Am I allowed to touch you now, Your Majesty?" Mello raised his eyebrows, one corner of his mouth rising humourlessly. Light considered rejecting him, but that would seem just a bit too suspicious. Luckily for him, Misa chose that very moment to squeal, seizing everybody's attention as she had a tendency to do.

"But then you won't have anything, L-san!" She screeched, and Light screamed with joy in his head, shifting imperceptibly until he was sitting on top of the phone.

What was this stretch of luck? Was this an apology from the universe? God knew he needed it.

Matt and Mello gave her deadpan looks. "Jesus, Misa, keep your voice down. You'll wake B."

Misa seemed entirely nonchalant about that possibility, picking up a plate and trotting over. Light glanced over and met L's eyes, those pitch-black eyes that seemed to pick apart his every thought and motive. He sincerely hoped L was not picking up on this one, he had gotten it too good. He couldn't mess it up now, not when escape was being served to him on a silver platter.

Misa reached him and knelt by him, shoving a wobbling pale-yellow cheesecake in front of his nose. "Look, you're so lucky, Raito-kun! You got the last food we have!"

It gave him an excuse to smile, at least. Light slipped his fingers under himself as discreetly as he could, wrapping them around the phone. "That looks great, Misa. Thank you."

Misa grinned broadly. "Misa hates to admit it, but it's all L-san. He sacrificed his sweets even though it makes him 20% stupider or something. He usually makes it a big deal."

He spied L giving him a sly glance from where he sat. Being in a particularly good mood now, Light decided to be magnanimous, giving him a sweet, bashful smile. "I…well, thank you." He pulled the mobile phone from its hiding place and slipped it deftly into his pants.

"You're welcome, Raito-kun." The monotone came in turn, and L's eyes met his again, inscrutable, speckled with grey.

"Open wide!" Misa chirped, holding the fork out in front of his nose.

From L's place, there was a low chuckle, almost hidden under the guffawing of Matt and his friend. But that chuckle, it was knowing, it _knew_.

There was no way he knew.

He let out a harried breath, looking down at the cheesecake Misa was holding oh-so-delicately on her fork. No, Light was being paranoid. L wasn't God, he didn't know everything. Daintily, Light took the piece in his mouth, letting the sweet tartness rest on his tongue before he swallowed.

The van jerked as it came to a halt, a movement that had BB slobbering awake and Matt rolling his eyes. The serial killer wiped the drool off his chin on the back of his hand. "Wh-wha.."

Misa hopped up to her feet. "We're here! We're here, we're here, we're here!" She placed the plate by her side and busied herself gathering up the long handcuff that had been discarded near her. Mello and Matt decided to retreat as well, the redhead giving back the gun, noticing nothing missing at all.

Light bit in his smirk, his eyes glancing away towards Ryuuzaki, who had gotten to his feet and was giving him an amused look.

"Welcome to the orphanage, Raito-kun." The detective said, and though there was no chance of it being true, it seemed like he knew exactly what was going through his mind.

.

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A/N: extra long chapter because of the extra long wait! Review and comment!


	14. Mud Cottage

Every time one of his captors said the word _orphanage_ , Light imagined a stinky rut of a hovel, a picture from his Geography textbook, a glorified mud cottage.

Orphanages in Shingata, like most other enterprises for the underprivileged, weren't particularly well-funded, and the private ones could only go so far without the backing of a noble. It hurt Light's overly charitable heart. He wanted Shingata to take care of its suffering citizens, goddamn it. If he could take all the money from the nobles and distribute it among the poor Robin Hood style, he would.

So yeah, he didn't expect an anarchist-managed institution to be anything more than a hole in the wall. Not in a million years.

"And we can share L's cheesecake with the orphans!" Misa squealed loudly, her tip of the spoon cold against his lip, yellow cake wobbling on it. Light blinked awake. Was she still here? It seemed he was getting used to her if he had learnt how to zone out of her gratingly loud voice. The last he remembered had been her reattaching the long handcuff to his shackled wrists and start on a long tirade about how bright the orphans were.

Obediently, he opened his mouth and let her feed him. Everyone except Misa had disembarked to get the place ready to confine him, with Mello being in charge of fetching them when they were done. They had been pretty transparent about their intentions: they were keeping him inside their secret base, which just so happened to be a home full of particularly intelligent children from all over the slums of Shingata.

It looked like they had no qualms about allowing him to stay at their main base and listen to their plans, even if they did slip into codes sometimes. It was a point in their favour, their trusting him in that minor way, because as far as he knew they weren't stupid. All the evidence pointed to them telling the truth.

It made sense. The timeline of their story coincided with Mikami's surgery on him. Maybe some part of it had been botched, and rather than explain it to him, the doctor had concluded that the poor soft mate would handle it badly. So he had concocted a conspiracy wherein everyone in his family and friend circle had been informed not to mention anything about that time he had been missing for half a year.

He wouldn't put it past him. His fiancé had always underestimated him, and Light's father would certainly give his consent to anything that involved keeping him under further restrictions.

Perhaps he should stay with these people longer, learn more about his previous life…

Light blinked, startled by the phrasing of his thoughts. _Previous life?_ He was being ridiculous! And if there was any chance of this conspiracy being true, he would deal with it by confronting Mikami, not by talking to his insane kidnappers.

He'd have to use the cellphone in his pants first, get to a safe spot to hide away and make a quick call, give them something to work with to track him down.

"That's why we'll have so much fun being handcuffed together!" Misa declared suddenly, and without warning, she shoved another spoonful of cheesecake into his mouth. Light choked, caught off guard, prompting a shocked gasp from the model.

"Sorry, Raito-kun!" She screeched. "Misa will get some water!" Light nodded frantically, coughing, focussing on swallowing the pasty lump that had gone down the wrong way.

"No need for that." A deep monotone came from the front of the van and Light almost fell into a new bout of coughing just to escape this. "I have brought some."

L, the master of foresight, stood with a large bottle of water in his hand, slumping over towards them. "Watari has declared Raito-kun's rooms safe for confinement, I have come to-oops." His hand accidentally-on-purpose knocked over a backpack from the pile that always stood inside the van.

Bright pink and glittering with sequins, it was obvious whose backpack it was, and predictably, Amane Misa hadn't zipped it. She shrieked as it spewed its contents onto the floor of the van and instinctively let go of Raito, diving to save her belongings. "No! Misa's makeup! She won't get any for two months!"

L approached Light, crouching beside him and holding the water bottle to his lips. Desperately, Light drank the water, thanking his lucky stars that it had been slippery cheesecake instead of candy or one of Sayu's jawbreakers.

When L finally pulled back, Light rolled his eyes, his wrist twinging with pain where he instinctively tried to raise his hand to wipe his mouth. "You sure took your own sweet time with that."

The detective grinned. "I apologise, Raito-kun. Are you alright?"

"I'm about as fine as can be, I guess." He shrugged. "Are you going to take me inside now?"

"Yes, that is what I was sent for-" The detective paused, eyeing Misa. Light glanced over at her, watching her struggle to reach the lipsticks that had rolled too far out of her grasp, straining against the handcuff. L smirked wryly, and Light raised his eyebrows. This man was plotting something, and by the looks of it, Misa wasn't going to like it.

"Amane-san? Do you need some help?" L asked tauntingly.

Misa fluttered her eyelashes beseechingly at him. "L-san, Watari-san won't allow Misa to spend any money on makeup for the next two months, so if Misa loses any she's going to be short for ages! She can't bear that! Please, L-san, pick them up for her!"

L raised his eyebrows. "Amane-san wants me to do her work for her?"

Light was starting to pick up on the plan. He grinned. "L-san, _you're_ the one who dropped the backpack." He said in a sickly-sweet honeyed voice, and was immediately struck through with a murderous glare.

Misa perked up at his words. "Exactly! L-san did it, so L-san should pick it up!"

The detective crossed his arms, his glower unwavering from where it was burning a hole into Light. "Amane-san, I have a lot of work to do. I have to untie Raito-kun and restrain him in his room, and after that I have to proceed with my investigation into Near. So, if you don't mind…" He ducked over quick as a flash, his fluffy hair pushed into Light's face as he reached across him into Misa's pocket and drew a small key from it. Light took a deep whiff, his hair smelled like vanilla cake.

The detective grabbed Misa's wrist and unlocked the handcuff from around it. The model squealed her displeasure. "L-san! Don't invade Misa's space like that!"

Light almost laughed. That was rich coming from her. He still remembered the party, where Misa had practically molested him and led to Mikami locking him in his bedroom for the rest of the night.

"Here you go. Pick up your things. I shall proceed with my work." L quickly crouched by Light's feet, using the key bunch he had apparently retrieved from Mello to unlock the restraints at his ankles and gently pull them off. The brunet relaxed his legs, separating them and relishing in the movement.

Misa huffed and trotted off, grabbing her lipsticks and eyeliners from the nooks and crannies they had rolled off into. Light watched her for a bit, then noticed L staring at him unblinkingly, sitting right in between his spread legs. The detective didn't seem to intend on untying Light's hands, crouching on the balls of his feet and leaning forward.

From this angle, it looked like he was going to kiss him.

The brunet raised his eyebrows, realising he wasn't all that repelled by that idea. Despite his weirdness, L was attractive in his own way. Except…he couldn't have this. The last thing he needed was to encourage such invasive behaviour from his kidnapper.

The detective's face was so close now, he could strike him right in the jaw from this position. It would be so satisfying to see that purple bruise blooming on his jawline…

The detective cocked an eyebrow. "I'll have you know I have learnt Capoeira, Raito-kun. Don't try to kick me."

"Oh yeah?"

"Yes. So if you would-" L shrank sharply to the side, avoiding Light's foot. The brunet drew his leg back and tried again, managing to knock him on the nose.

"Haha! Fuck you! You don't tell me what to do-" Was all Light managed before L swept his foot in an arc, hitting his temple and sending him careening into the ground. The teenager moaned with pain, writhing.

L pursed his lips. "Are you okay, Raito-kun?"

"Does it look like I'm fucking okay?" He hissed through his teeth. "How is this a fair fight? My hands are literally tied behind my back!"

"I told you not to kick me." The detective mumbled.

"Hey, don't hurt my Raito! Get lost, Misa will bring him!" Misa yelled, trotting forward with her arms full of makeup products she stuck back into her bag.

"Your Raito? Are you trying to steal my boyfriend, Amane-san?" L asked sagely, and the model stopped dead.

"What? Misa would never-!" The model protested as Light simultaneously snapped "I'm _not_ your boyfriend."

"Because it sure seems that way, considering you have handcuffed yourself to him and are trying to turn him against me." The detective droned, biting his thumb. Light scoffed, flicking his head to get his long fringe out of his eyes.

"The handcuffs aren't even her fault. What the fuck are you talking about?"

"Exactly!" Misa twittered. "Raito-kun said it exactly right!"

"I thought you had changed, Amane-san. I thought you had put your evil days behind you." L shook his head morosely. The model squawked, horrified.

"Misa didn't do anything, L-san! Misa only wants to follow Watari-san's orders and keep an eye on her Raito-"

"Unfortunately, Misa-san, I do not believe you for an instant." L said, squatting down beside where Raito had fallen. "And so, I'm sure you will understand my taking measures to stop you from stealing away the love of my life."

"Misa didn't do anything-" She cut herself off when L picked up the end of the long handcuff that Misa had discarded by Light's side. Her hazel eyes widened. "L-san, what are you _doing-?"_

"I hope you will understand my motives behind this, and will not involve unnecessary people such as Watari into this situation." L, resolutely, clicked the handcuff locked around his own wrist.

"But L-san, Watari-san _said-"_

"If you tell on me, Amane-san…" The key shone small and silver between his long, pale fingers. He held it up in front of his face. "If you tell on me, Amane-san, I will swallow the key."

"What the _fuck?"_ Light yelped. The detective stifled a smile, and he felt like kicking him again.

"I am childish and hate to lose. So what will it be? Will you involve Watari or will you just let this go?"

Misa gaped blankly at him, and abruptly stomped her foot to the ground, aggravated. "Ugh! This is so unfair! Misa just wanted to spend some time with her Raito!" She turned on her heel, throwing the van doors open as she stomped out. L finally allowed his grin to break free.

"Justice always prevails." He whispered under his breath. Light burst out laughing.

* * *

Sayu Yagami had never been so afraid in her life.

Was this how her brother had lived, months ago? Had he just migrated from cinderblock house to cinderblock house as he tried to stay alive? Were his friends all slum rats? Had he really hated his life so much that he had stooped to _this_ to escape it?

Sayu couldn't understand it. Mikami had to have been torturing him for him to choose this nomadic existence over the life of a noble.

Sayu sighed as she held her pepper spray tightly in her hand.

She remembered the last time she had talked to her brother, her _actual_ brother, the one who hated them all, who hated her. He had been zip-tied to the metal frame of his bed like a lunatic on suicide watch, in a skimpy hospital gown that only reached his knees and a entirely blanked expression, only his sharp amber eyes conveying the absolute loathing he felt for each of them.

They had told her not to visit, but how could she not? She hadn't seen him for months, her mother hadn't seen him for longer than that, they had all thought he was dead. Sachiko had had an emotional breakdown, Sayu was failing all her classes, their father…their father hadn't come home from work for sixty days and counting. She had to see him, she had to see that he was alive and okay, she had to _see it_.

But, of course, it had been a mistake.

His usually perfectly groomed auburn hair was shaggy and overlong, falling messily over his forehead, his nails were digging into his skin so deep that the blood coated his palm, smeared over the bedframe, his jaw gritted tight enough for her own teeth to ache in sympathy.

His eyes were fixed on the ceiling, tracing the cracks and slathers of paint, but she knew he was watching her. He hadn't spoken to anybody since they rescued him from the anarchists he had been with, but…but she was his little sister. He was her brother, he would speak to her, she knew it. Mikami knew it too. Even though his father had driven them apart with his decision, even though they hadn't properly spoken for years, he would speak to her. She was the only one who understood him, after all.

"Onii-chan?" She'd started hesitantly, but he had turned his face away, shutting his eyes. She almost drew back, hurt, before she realised what the problem was.

Her mother realised it in the same instant. "Raito, don't tell me to leave, I haven't seen you for so long!"

Sayu touched her mother's arm reassuringly. "It's okay, Okaa-san. He'll come around. It's only for now."

To her shock, rather than just quietly leave as she usually did, Yagami Sachiko burst into loud, violent tears. "Please, Raito! I'm sorry! You don't know how sorry I am!"

Raito let out a quiet breath, as if she was trying his patience. Sayu was almost irritated with him, almost, before she remembered where she was. "Okaa-san, just go. It'll be fine."

Sachiko let out a shaky sob and stood up ramrod straight, mincing her steps as she walked out without another word.

Sayu had been watching her leave, wondering how she was going to fix this at home, when she heard Raito's quiet whisper.

"Do you know what they're going to do to me?"

Sayu turned back to look at him. His voice was raspy, his face pale, eyes squeezed shut. She knew that expression well, looking down at his hands and finding that, unsurprisingly, he had scratched out new cuts in his palm, the blood now dripping down his wrist onto the bedclothes.

The brunette sighed, wrapping her hands around his and twisting his fingers straight. "Who do you mean? The anarchists?"

"No." He chuckled bitterly. "No, it's not the anarchists, obviously." He shook his head, looking away. "It's so hard to talk to you now."

Sayu blinked, hurt. He had never said that before. Even in their angriest moments, even when they thought they would hate each other forever, they had never said anything like that. They were a pair, a team. Even if they hadn't been on speaking terms for the longest time, they could still read each others' minds, right? "I haven't met any anarchists, Onii-chan. I don't know what trauma you've been through. If you just explain-"

"I haven't been through any trauma but the kind you people have put me through." He gritted out. "Do you know what I was doing for all these months?"

Sayu shook her head. "No, but I always got it in my head that you ran away to start your own detective agency." She smiled shakily. "You know, because of what happened with Otou-san…"

Light turned to her, eyes lit up with surprise for once. "That's…that's actually pretty accurate." Sayu let her smile grow. "But that's not all."

The girl frowned. "Yeah, Otou-san was saying you were rescued from an abandoned warehouse-"

"I was consorting with anarchists."

It took a minute to sink in, but when it did Sayu choked, leaping to her feet. "Onii-chan, you can't be serious! Consorting with…with anarchists? With terrorists? How could you-?"

"It's not half as bad as you think." Light whispered. "I didn't kill anyone, Sayu. They didn't kill anyone. They're good people-"

"Bullshit!" Sayu yelped. "How can a terrorist be a good person?"

"But not all anarchists are terrorists, Sayu!" Light said earnestly. "Don't you remember how the outlawing started during the war? How they hunted down almost half the non-nobles in law enforcement because of circumstantial evidence? They convicted people with vague associations to terrorists, all of those innocent people are on the run from the law, don't you get it? It's not fair to-"

Sayu covered her face with her palm. "Raito…"

His jaw snapped shut, his eyes turning stony. "I should have known you wouldn't understand. There's no point talking to you."

"No, Raito. I understand. I get it, I get what you're feeling." She licked her lips. "But...it's against the law."

"It is." Light smiled ruefully. "Life imprisonment for anarchy, and twenty years with parole for any noble who consorts with them."

 _Twenty years?_ Sayu froze in shock. "N-no. Raito…" She covered her mouth with her hand. "No, Raito, you…you can't…t-twenty years?" She'd be thirty-six. Raito would be nearly forty. "Raito, I won't let you, Otou-san won't let you! He wouldn't, it would tarnish the family honour! He'll keep you out somehow, I know he will! Raito-"

"You're right, Sayu."

The girl paused. "What?"

Light blew out a tired sigh. "You're right. Otou-san won't let me ruin the family honour."

She blinked, wondering if she should feel relieved. It sounded like good news, but why did Raito look so sad? "B-but Raito…"

An ironic smirk twisted the brunet's lips. "He's not going to let me go to jail."

"T-that's great!" Sayu felt uneasiness pool in her stomach. "That's awesome…isn't it?"

"Yeah. Yeah, it's great. It's…" He swallowed. "It's amazing."

"Raito…" Sayu watched as her brother's eyes glimmered with tears. A stab of fear went through her. Raito didn't cry, she had never seen him cry for anything. He had been through so much more than her and he hadn't cried once. "Raito, what's wrong? I...how can I-"

The brunet didn't answer, looking away. The tears fell down his cheeks, marking glittering trails. "Raito, please, what can I do? I want to help."

"Go away." He bit out. "Go away or I'll scream and make you go."

"Onii-chan, why…?" Sayu felt tears of her own pool in her eyes. She refused to leave. She _refused_. "What happened? Please tell me, I can help, I swear!"

"I'll scream, I mean it." His voice was thick, his nails tearing his skin apart. He would get scabs, an infection, she went to pry them away but he flinched. "I mean it, Sayu, go!"

"No!" She stood her ground. "I'm not leaving until you tell me what's wrong!"

She could see the loathing again. Deep inside his eyes, coiled like a snake with poisonous fangs. "Stay, then." His cheeks were blotchy red, his jaw clenched obstinately. "Stay and rot in hell."

She had stayed for hours. She'd tried everything to make him talk, but if there was one thing she knew, there was no changing Raito's mind once he'd made it up. It was a family trait.

Except, that wasn't entirely true. There were ways to change his mind, there were ways to fix everything. Her father and Mikami knew that well.

The next time she saw Raito his smile had been warm and friendly, no loathing in sight, a linen bandage wrapped tightly around the crown of his head.

Sayu bundled herself tighter into her blanket, squeezing her eyes shut. Her cellphone was right next to her, ready for an emergency call, all of the training she had gone through at the self-defence workshop at the forefront of her mind.

She wasn't going to let it happen again. This time, _she_ would find her Onii-chan, and she would save his life, whether he liked it or not.

Sayu curled up and rested her blistering feet in a warehouse in East Shingata, her hand wrapped firmly around her pocketknife.

.

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A/N: extra long chapter because of the extra long wait (again!)! Review and comment!


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